Happy “Eat Brussels Sprouts Day!”
Though for most of my life I had doubts
About choking down cooked Brussels sprouts,
I flout them no more;
Well prepared, they’re top drawer.
Now I tout ’em instead. No more pouts!
Archive for the ‘Odd Holidays’ Category
Limerick Ode To Brussels Sprouts
Sunday, January 31st, 2016Limerick Ode To “Clashing Clothes Day”
Friday, January 29th, 2016Damn! I somehow missed “Clashing Clothes Day” yesterday. (It’s celebrated annually on the 4th Thursday of January.)
But it’s never too late for a limerick:
A fellow who’d constantly clash
And wear clothes that appeared to be trash,
Attended a party
Quite retro and arty.
His clothing “designs” were a smash.
Happy “Spouses Day!” (Jan. 26)
Tuesday, January 26th, 2016Since it’s “Spouses Day,” please get in gear.
You should lovingly cherish and cheer
Your dear husband or wife
And steer clear of spouse-strife.
Why we DON’T do this daily ain’t clear.
There Are Hugs … and There Are HUGS Limerick)
Thursday, January 21st, 2016Just in time for National Hugging Day:
In a nightmare, she’s mauled by a bear,
As she fitfully sleeps on her chair.
But the truth makes her grouse;
She’d been hugged by her spouse.
“You scared me,” she says. “You need Nair!”
Cheesy Limerick
Wednesday, January 20th, 2016A man who should never eat cheese,
Ignores ev’ry cough and each wheeze
That comes in reaction
And once led to traction;
He can’t hack cheese-attraction disease.
Happy National Cheese Lovers Day, which is celebrated on January 20th.
Note: National Cheese Day falls on June 4th.
Sowing Angry Customers (Limerick)
Sunday, January 17th, 2016A limerick for Customer Service Day (January 17):
A seamstress would frequently snap
At her patrons, increasing the gap
Between income and cost.
Seems her bus’ness was lost
Cuz of failure to button her yap!
Gunning For A Hot, Spicy Meal (Limerick)
Saturday, January 16th, 2016My “Dear Chef” limerick, just in time for International Hot and Spicy Food Day (Jan. 16):
Dear Chef:
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My pref’rence is food that is hot;
Not in contrast to cold, but that’s got
Lots of tongue-burning spice.
This Thai entree with rice
Should attack me. Is THAT your best shot?
Happy National Hat Day! (Limerick)
Friday, January 15th, 2016What’s my excuse for this ridiculous limerick? It’s National Hat Day. (January 15)
A woman who always wore hats
Would never be seen without spats.
Did they match? But of course!
And this clotheshorse’s course
Was to also adopt matching cats.
Happy National Spaghetti Day (Limerick)
Monday, January 4th, 2016Today’s a big day for spaghetti,
Although no one is throwing confetti.
Not too thin, not too thick,
It is reas’nably quick
To prepare, though disdained by the petty.
(National Spaghetti Day is January 4. This isn’t to be confused with National Pasta Day, which is Oct.17.)
Limerick Ode To Yet Another Insignificant Holiday
Monday, January 4th, 2016It’s Trivia Day, says some screed,
A trivial fact, I’ll concede.
But I doubt that you’re stunned,
Cuz just when have I shunned
Any op for a frivolous read?
(National Trivia Day is January 4.)
Limerick Ode To Drinking Straw Day (Jan. 3)
Saturday, January 2nd, 2016Few inventions inspire my awe,
But I’m rather impressed with the straw.
Sucking liquid through tubes
Is suggestive of lubes…
Although straw men still stick in my craw.
(National Drinking Straw Day is celebrated on January 3, in honor of Marvin Stone’s January 3, 1888 patent.)
Happy Dewey Decimal Day! (Limerick)
Thursday, December 10th, 2015When I was a child (way, way, way before computers) I was fascinated by the Dewey Decimal System. How I loved perusing the sliding drawers of those beautiful wooden library cases! They were packed with tiny cards, key to my quest for the number that would lead me to a book’s aisle and shelf location.
So I feel compelled to celebrate Dewey Decimal Day with a limerick. (It’s observed each year on December 10th, in honor of the birthday of Melvil Dewey, inventor of the Dewey Decimal System.)
The U.S. librarian Dewey
Found our library book placement screwy.
“Shelve this system,” he said.
“Number topics instead!”
(So chop suey is near ratatouille.)
Note: Under this topical/numeric system, food books would generally fall into the 641 classification. Cooking and recipes would be 641.5, whereas “cooking specific kinds of composite dishes” would be 641.8.
Happy National Pastry Day (Limerick)
Wednesday, December 9th, 2015A pastry chef promised to can
All her plans to procure a nice tan,
Cuz fresh wrinkles appeared
Ev’ry day, which she feared
Came from baking like cake in a pan.
Happy National Pastry Day. (December 9)
Limerick Ode To Galileo’s Telescope
Thursday, December 3rd, 2015A celebratory limerick for Telescope Day.
Galileo perfected in spades
The magnificent gadget that aids
Us in viewing the stars
And the planets, like Mars.
Of course, NOW we need curtains and shades.
Limerick For National Mutt Day
Wednesday, December 2nd, 2015Happy National Mutt Day! (It’s celebrated twice a year, on December 2nd and July 31.)
Today we must cherish the mutt.
Mongrels matter, no if, and, or but.
Purebred dogs may be chic,
But each mixed breed’s unique.
It’s clear cut. Walk yours proudly and strut.
Don’t Tell Anybody, But…
Friday, November 13th, 2015I’ve heard a little rumor
That it’s “Start A Rumor Day”
From some scuttlebutting boomer.
Let’s hold gossiping at bay.
Pretend I did not tell you
Of this holiday, absurd.
Please don’t let my news impel you
To repeat it. Not a word!
The Felonious Feline (Limerick)
Thursday, October 29th, 2015Just in time for National Cat Day (Oct 29):
Dear cat, you can’t dupe me with purr-bull,
And you don’t deserve anything herbal.
No treats and no pity,
Felonious kitty!
I’ve proof that you’ve eaten my gerbil.
Just In Time For “National Potato Day” (Limerick)
Tuesday, October 27th, 2015Happy National Potato Day! (October 27)
A woman with terrible taste
Cooked potatoes that tasted like paste.
“I just can’t choke them down,”
Growled her spouse with a frown.
“Now I know where the Elmer’s misplaced.”
