Archive for the ‘Exercise Humor’ Category
Saturday, January 13th, 2024
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using GRAND at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to COACHES, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best COACH-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
GRIP, LUSH, PROMISING, SEARCH, YARN.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on February 11, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, February 10, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my GRAND-Rhyme Limerick:
A grandstanding fellow named Mel
Plays the piano, but not very well.
His recital was panned:
“He abused that poor grand
And deserves a life sentence in hell.”
And here’s my COACH-Themed Limerick:
“Don’t sit like a bump on a log,”
Said the coach. “Shake a leg. Maybe jog.
If you want to get fit,
It’s time to show grit,
And skip all the eggnog and grog.”
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
While reciting a tale, Dan said “Darn!
I’ve forgotten the end of this yarn,
Which (I promise) is gripping.
It features unzipping
And (maybe) a cow in a barn.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Coaches Humor, Competition Limerick, Exercise Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Music Humor, Piano Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Reviewers Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Exercise Humor, Light Verse Contest, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Music Reviews, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 121 Comments »
Wednesday, December 13th, 2023
Notwithstanding this limerick, I do stretching exercises daily:
It’s important to stretch, so I’m told.
Some claim it fights pain when you’re old.
I prefer not to kvetch,
But that feels like a stretch…
Though with luck, it might fend off a cold.
(“National Stretching Day” falls on December 11th.)
Tags: December Holidays, Exercise Humor, Exercise Limerick, Odd Holidays, Stretching, Stretching Day, Stretching Humor
Posted in Exercise Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Stressed About Stretching? (Limerick)
Monday, November 13th, 2023
An athlete ran nude down the street
And was caught by the cops — no mean feat.
He explained (all erect)
“‘Twas a test to detect
If detectives on foot can be fleet.”
Tags: Bawdy Humor, Bawdy Limerick, Cops & Police, Crime Humor, Crime Limerick, Exercise Humor, Exercise Limerick, Jogging, Nudity, Nudity Humor, Nudity Limerick, Running
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Crime & Punishment Humor, Exercise Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Outdoors Humor | Comments Off on An Athletic Test (Limerick)
Wednesday, June 21st, 2023
This headline reminded me that today (June 21) is International Day Of Yoga: “International Yoga Day: PM Modi leads celebrations at UN Headquarters in New York”.
So it’s time for yet another yoga-related limerick:
I used to do yoga most days.
It was more than a health-conscious phase.
But I did it MY way;
Certain moves were a NAY
To avoid setting bad wrists ablaze.
Tags: Exercise Humor, Health Limericks, International Day of Yoga, International Yoga Day, June Holidays, Mental Health Humor, Odd Holidays, PM Modi, Relaxation Humor, Sports Limerick, Stress Humor, United Nations, World Yoga Day, Yoga Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Celebrations Poetry, Celebrity Humor, Exercise Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Happy Yoga Day! (Limerick)
Friday, June 2nd, 2023
My knees are at last on the mend.
They even (reluctantly) bend.
Are they trek-worthy? No!
But they’ll go to and fro
Sev’ral blocks. (Just don’t make them ascend!)
Tags: Health, Health & Medical Humor, Health Limerick, Knee Limerick, Knees, Walking Humor, Walking Limerick
Posted in Exercise Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limericks, Walking Humor | 2 Comments »
Saturday, April 22nd, 2023
Last weekend, we took a short stroll
To a mini-golf range — a fun goal,
Though I CAN’T aim at all;
Ended up with no ball,
Its location, alas, a black hole.
Tags: Exercise Humor, Exercise Limerick, Golf Humor, Golf Limerick, Outdoors Humor, Outdoors Limerick, Sports Humor, Sports Limerick, Walking Humor, Walking Limerick, Walking Poetry
Posted in Clumsiness Humor, Exercise Humor, Limericks, Outdoors Humor, Sports Humor, Walking Humor | Comments Off on Mini-Golf Madness (Limerick)
Saturday, June 11th, 2022
Riding bikes while you’re naked sounds odd,
No matter the shape of your bod.
If you’re nude and ride past,
Kindly pedal by fast.
And do NOT expect ME to applaud!
(World Naked Bike Ride Day is celebrated each year on the second Saturday of June.)
Tags: Bawdy Limericks, Bicycle Humor, Bicycle Limerick, Bike Humor, Bike Limerick, June Holidays, Naked Bike Ride Day, Nudity, Nudity Humor, Nudity Limerick, Odd Holidays, World Naked Bike Ride Day
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Exercise Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Transportation Humor | 3 Comments »
Saturday, May 14th, 2022
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using WIRE at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to WATER, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best WATER-related limerick.
And if all that isn’t enough, I’m adding an EXTRA, EXPERIMENTAL LIMERICK CHALLENGE TODAY! If it works out well, it may become an occasional, or perhaps even a regular Limerick-Off feature:
I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
RETIRE, ARROGANT, MISCREANT, SHOES, THINK.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on May 29, 2022, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, May 28, 2022, at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my WIRE-rhyme limerick:
This disbursement is urgent. It’s dire!
If it’s late, there’s no quelling the ire
Of a violent man
With a life-or-death plan.
Send it pronto. It’s down to the wire.
Here’s my WATER-themed limerick:
“The first time I jogged wasn’t fun.
I was parched when I’d barely begun;
I’d forgotten to heed
The “must bring water” creed
So, alas, ’twas a dreadful dry run.”
And here is my own RANDOM WORDS GENERATOR Limerick:
I think that my arrogant boss
Should retire already. No loss
Would be felt by his staff
We would all simply laugh,
Throw a party and roast him with sauce.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Bad Bosses, Boss Humor, Competition Limerick, Crime & Punishment Humor, Dry Humor, Exercise Humor, Jogging Humor, Jogging Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Random Words, Random Words Generator, Running Humor, Running Limerick, Thirst Humor, Urgency Humor, Urgency Limerick, Water Humor, Water Limerick, Wire Humor, Wire Limerick, Workplace & Career Humor, Workplace Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Crime & Punishment Humor, Exercise Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Workplace & Career Humor | 159 Comments »
Wednesday, April 6th, 2022
A marathon runner named Ace
Loved to brag about every damn race.
His long-winded tales
Would induce plaintive wails:
“Stop meandering. Cut to the chase!”
Tags: Bragging Humor, Bragging Limerick, Competitive Humor, Competitive Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Marathon Humor, Marathon Limerick, Running Humor, Running Limerick, Talkative Limerick, Talkativeness
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Exercise Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Outdoors Humor | Comments Off on Long-Winded Limerick
Saturday, July 10th, 2021
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using TALE OR TAIL OR ENTAIL OR CURTAIL at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to VANITY, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best VANITY-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on July 25, 2021, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, July 24, 2021 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my TALE/TAIL/ENTAIL/CURTAIL-rhyme limerick:
I’ve a crime tale entailing a tail.
Who’s the target? A male out on bail.
Law enforcement, you see,
Was convinced he would flee.
But their quarry just likes a good sail.
And here’s my VANITY-themed limerick:
A fellow who’d constantly train
Did it mostly because he was vain.
He’s paid a steep price
To simply look nice:
At thirty he’s using a cane.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Crime, Crime and Punishment, Exercise, Health Limericks, Humorous Tales, Law And Order, Law Enforcement, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Men's Vanity, Poetry & Prompts, Tails Humor, Vanity, Vanity Humor, Working Out, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Exercise Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 199 Comments »
Saturday, September 15th, 2018
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using HOLE or WHOLE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to SCHOOL SUPPLIES, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best SCHOOL SUPPLIES-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on September 30, 2018, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, September 29, 2018 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
A fellow went out for a stroll,
Healthy exercise largely his goal.
He encountered a hitch,
Falling down in a ditch.
Not too healthy that walk, on the (w)hole.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Exercise Humor, Health, Health Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Exercise Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 170 Comments »
Saturday, October 17th, 2015
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using BURN at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
A woman was feeling the burn
While working to firm up her stern.
“But your butt is perfection!”
Was hubby’s objection.
“It’s a rear end I’m learning to earn.”
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Exercise Humor, Gym Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Physical Appearance, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 74 Comments »
Saturday, June 20th, 2015
The U.N. has decreed June 21 to be International Day Of Yoga … which gives me a handy excuse to post this silly limerick:
A gal doing yoga while dressed
In a toga, when questioned, confessed
That her garb did not work—
Turned her poses berserk.
So instead of relaxed, she was stressed.
Tags: Clothing Humor, Exercise Humor, Health Limericks, International Day of Yoga, International Yoga Day, June Holidays, Mental Health Humor, Odd Holidays, Relaxation Humor, Stress Humor, Toga Humor, Yoga Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Celebrations Poetry, Clothing Humor, Exercise Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Odd Holidays, Physical Appearance | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, January 13th, 2015
Yoga Tale (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A student was learning a stretch
From her yoga instructor — a lech
Who made passes in classes;
He loved fetching asses.
A class action’s been filed v. that wretch.
*****
View my Yoga Tale Limerick image here.
Tags: Bawdy Humor, Class Actions, Exercise Humor, Lascivious Humor, Lecherous Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick Images, Litigation Humor, Yoga Humor, Yoga Limerick
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Education & School Humor, Exercise Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, October 14th, 2014
Wexting? How Pedestrian! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A habit that many find vexing
Is called “wexting.” I think it’s perplexing
To text while you walk.
If you wext, then I’ll balk
At sharing a path you’re annexing.
Tags: Cell Phone, Communication Humor, Computer Humor, Multitasking, Pedestrians, TaW, Technology Humor, Telephone Humor, Texting, Texting And Walking, Texting Humor, Walking Humor, Wexting
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Computer Humor, Exercise Humor, Limericks, Technology Humor, Telephone Humor, Walking Humor | Comments Off on Wexting? How Pedestrian! (Limerick)
Thursday, October 9th, 2014
Python Massage? What Kind Of Snake Oil Are They Selling? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A python massage? Thanks, but no!
It’s relaxing, you claim? I say whoa!
If it’s torture I’m after
(Now please hold your laughter)
Then off to the gym I shall go.
If you want a complimentary python massage, all you have to do is visit the Philippines Zoo.
Tags: Exercise Humor, Massage Humor, Philippines Zoo, Python Massage, Pythons, Relaxation Humor, Snake Limericks, Zoo humor
Posted in Animal & Pet Humor, Exercise Humor, Limericks, Travel Humor | 1 Comment »
Saturday, July 26th, 2014
Ordinarily, I’d celebrate National Dance Day today by dancing. But a mysterious foot injury’s forcing me to sublimate by writing a limerick:
Limerick Ode To National Dance Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It’s Dance Day, so dance if you can.
Do the can-can or whirl with a fan.
Give your muscles some work,
Though it’s best not to twerk
Without checking your medical plan.
Alternative Version For Can-Can Day (Oct. 21):
It’s Can-Can Day. Dance if you can.
Kick your legs. Whirl those skirts. Twirl a fan.
Give your muscles some work,
Though it’s best not to twerk
Without checking your medical plan.
Tags: Ballroom Dance, Can-Can Day, Dancing Humor, July Holidays, National Can-Can Day, National Dance Day, October Holidays, Odd Holidays
Posted in Dance Humor, Exercise Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Odd Holidays | 1 Comment »
Thursday, May 15th, 2014
May 16th is National Bike to Work Day. Of course, some rides work out better than others:
A Spousal Ride (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Spousal nagging pushed hubby to strike
Some balance by riding a bike.
But when ego and ass
Took a beating, alas,
He told biking and wife, “Take a hike!”
Tags: Bicycle Limerick, Bike Humor, Exercise Humor, Husband Wife Limerick, Marriage Verse, Outdoor Activity Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Exercise Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Outdoors Humor | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, January 7th, 2014
Cold and Bothered (Quatrain)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I live in a town where it’s pleasant to stroll.
We do most of our errands on foot.
But it’s frightfully cold. “Let’s stay home,” I cajole.
Forget milk! Let’s be smart and stay put.
(January 11 is National Milk Day.)
Tags: Bayside, Errands Humor, Exercise, Food Verse, January Holidays, Milk Day, Milk Humor, Milk Limerick, New York City Verse, Odd Holidays, Quatrain Humor, Seasonal Humor, Seasonal Verse, Shopping Verse, Walking Poetry, Weather Poem, Winter Humor
Posted in Exercise Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, New York Limericks & Haiku, Odd Holidays, Quatrains Humor, Seasons Humor, Shopping Humor, Walking Humor, Weather Humor | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, August 6th, 2013
Wiggle Your Toes Day (August 6th) isn’t quite as silly as it sounds:
Limerick Ode To Wiggle Your Toes Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Since I’d like both my feet to obey,
I must exercise each ev’ry day:
I wiggle my toes,
Rotate heels — heaven knows
It looks lame, but forestalls foot decay.
Tags: Exercise Humor, Feet Humor, Foot Limerick, Health Limericks, Odd Holidays, Toes Humor, Wiggle Your Toes Day
Posted in Exercise Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Odd Holidays | 1 Comment »
