John the botanist’s dull as can be.
His life is a blathering spree.
He ignores all my pleas
To stop shooting the breeze,
And can talk all the bark off a tree.
Archive for the ‘Communication Humor’ Category
The Blathering Botanist (Limerick)
Saturday, November 20th, 2021Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: CAB at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5
Sunday, October 16th, 2016It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using CAB at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to FRUIT, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best FRUIT-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on Oct 30, 2016, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, October 29, 2016 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
A garrulous gadfly would gab,
Driving ev’ryone nuts as he’d blab.
People longed to be spared
The critiques that he aired,
En route to their flights in his cab.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
“Be Heard Day” (Limerick)
Monday, March 7th, 2016Please don’t be deterred: It’s “Be Heard Day.”
(Some call it a “dumb and absurd day.”)
Being heard’s a great goal.
Staying mum takes its toll.
Don’t convert it to “message deferred” day.
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: POT at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5
Saturday, August 15th, 2015It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using POT at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
A man who liked stirring the pot
Made trouble more often than not.
He needed no kitchen
To heat up some bitchin’
And could cook it up right on the spot.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tone-Deaf Limerick
Tuesday, August 4th, 2015Tone-Deaf Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man who used vocal inflection
To convey his disdain and rejection,
Would deflect ev’ry claim
That he aimed to inflame:
“I’m blameless. My word choice? Perfection!”
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: MAIL or MALE at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5
Saturday, May 9th, 2015It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using either MAIL or MALE at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
While lunching and sorting my mail,
I saw markings that referenced “jail.”
Seems a worker’d gone postal,
Or possibly toastal…
All my mail was stamped “Send bread for bail.”
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
In Praise of the Grumble (Limerick)
Thursday, January 22nd, 2015In Praise of the Grumble (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I pity the person who curbs me
From grumbling when something perturbs me.
I find grumbling essential
For humor potential;
How else would I know what disturbs me?
(Inspired by Joshua Rothman’s A Few Notes On Grumbling in The New Yorker.)
Limerick Ode To “Babbling Day” (October 21)
Tuesday, October 21st, 2014Today’s the one day it’s okay to be a blatherskite. Why? Because it’s Babbling Day. Just don’t make a habit of it … like the fellow in my limerick:
Limerick Ode To “Babbling Day”
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow who tended to rap
About nonsense was taking a nap.
“I’m so glad he’s asleep,”
Said his wife, “cuz I weep
And I yawn when he babbles that pap.”
Me, Myself, & I (Limerick)
Thursday, September 25th, 2014Do you cringe when people incorrectly use the reflexive pronoun “myself” instead of “me?”
Myself too! (And yes, I was joking.)
Misuse of “myself” is widespread.
It’s an error that people should shed.
To reflexively use it
And often abuse it
May stop you from getting ahead.
This Invention Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test (Limerick)
Saturday, June 14th, 2014This Invention Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m vexed and a little perplexed
By the concept of smells sent by text.
I do not mean to vent,
But don’t send me a scent,
Or our friendship is apt to be exed.
(Harvard engineering professor David Edwards and co-inventor Rachel Fields have invented an aromatic mobile messaging device called an oPhone that sends and receives scents.)
Cursing’s Healthy, I Swear (Limerick)
Thursday, May 15th, 2014Cursing’s Healthy, I Swear (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
New research, Brit experts declare,
Has revealed that it’s healthy to swear.
So you damn SOBs,
No more slamming my ease
With the expletive. Carpers beware!
Say “NO!” To “Yes, Dear”
Wednesday, April 30th, 2014Say “NO!” To “Yes, Dear”
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Here’s something most husbands should fear:
Wives’ reactions on hearing, “Yes, dear.”
It’s a phrase to avoid
Cuz we’re not just annoyed,
But enraged. Guys could lose precious “gear.”
Life With Mark Kane
Tuesday, April 29th, 2014(All dialogue guaranteed true)
Mark: “Now that I’ve won, I can go to sleep.” (gazing down, admiringly, at his laptop’s “free cell” screen at 10 pm)
Me: “Remember that Walter Kirn book I mentioned the other day?”
Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” (still looking down)
Me: “The one about the impostor…”
Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” (still looking down)
Me: “I just started reading it.”
Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” (still looking down)
Me: “You’re not listening to me.”
Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” (still looking down)
Me: “I said you’re not listening to me!”
Mark: “Huh??? Yes, I am.”
Me: “What am I talking about?”
Mark: “Uh…”
Me: “Remember? The Kirn book? I was telling you about it the other day.”
Mark: “Oh yeah.” (surreptitiously typing.)
Me: “You’re looking up “Kirn” in Google aren’t you?”
Mark: “Of course not! I remember you talking about Bruce Kern.”
Me: “I’ve never even heard of Bruce Kern. Stop trying to cheat with Google.”
Mark: “I’m not trying to cheat.”
Me: “Yes you are. I’m talking about WALTER Kirn’s book about the Rockefeller impostor.”
Mark: “Oh, yeah. Jay Rockefeller and the Hamptons.”
Me: “No! “CLARK Rockefeller. Driving a crippled dog from Montana to Manhattan.”
Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.”
Me: “I give up!”
Limerick Rant
Wednesday, August 28th, 2013Limerick Rant
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A botanist, rather a ranter,
Looked down upon lighthearted banter.
Though he constantly “shared”
His views, which he blared,
When his wife tried to talk, he’d supplant ‘er.
Limerick Ode To The ZIP Code
Monday, July 1st, 2013Happy birthday to the ZIP Code, born fifty years ago, on July 1, 1963.
Limerick Ode To The ZIP Code
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Today is the birthday of ZIP Codes–
Those digital sort and then ship codes
That help us get mail,
Which they’re now calling “snail.”
With email, these aren’t such hip codes.
A Polite Limerick
Wednesday, July 11th, 2012The latest prompt from Three Words Wednesday asks us to use these three words in any sort of poem: Differ, Halt, and Imagine. And somehow I coaxed them all into a limerick:
A Polite Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When planning a verbal assault,
It can sometimes be useful to halt
And imagine your view
With a more polite skew:
Beg to differ‘s a handy default.
