Archive for the ‘Anxiety & Stress’ Category
Sunday, October 31st, 2010
Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A frazzled new father named Jim…
Here’s mine:
Frazzled Limerick (Frazzled Limerick Audio)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A frazzled new father named Jim
Bought his baby toy trains on a whim.
When his wife saw the gift,
She was terribly miffed,
So she yelled, “That’s for you. What’s for him?”
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, right above my photo. Thanks!
Update: May 2 is Baby Day.
Tags: Baby Day, Battle of the Sexes, Children Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Husband Wife Limerick, Marriage Verse, May Holidays, Model Trains Humor, Odd Holidays, Parenting Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Children Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Odd Holidays, Poetry & Prompts | 19 Comments »
Wednesday, September 15th, 2010
Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A woman who readily cried…
Here’s mine. (It’s a three-verse limerick, but a standard one-verse limerick is fine, of course.)
Weepy Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman who readily cried
Never learned to take movies in stride.
She would feel oh so low
And her tear drops would flow
When a character sickened or died.
She’d weep for the good guys and bad—
Did not matter — they both made her sad.
How her husband freaked out
When she sobbed for a lout
Like a killer or mean, deadbeat dad.
He told her, “You’re acting insane.
Is there something amiss with your brain?
Please don’t cry for a villain
Who merits his killin’.
Put clamps on your waterworks main.”
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
(If you’d like to receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting Limerick-Off first line alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, right above my photo. Thanks!)
Tags: Crying, Husband Wife Limerick, Marriage Humor, Movie & Play Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Tears, Writing Prompts
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Movie & Play Humor, Poetry & Prompts | 19 Comments »
Wednesday, August 11th, 2010
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A woman who hated high tech…
Here’s mine:
High-Tech Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman who hated high tech
Found computers a pain in the neck.
Whether Mac or PC,
How that gal longed to flee
Back five decades — a time machine trek.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.
Tags: Computer Verse, Luddites, Poetry & Prompts, Simple Life, Techie Humor, Technology Humor, Technophobes, Time Machine, Writing Prompts
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Technology Humor, Time Humor | 15 Comments »
Wednesday, June 16th, 2010
I’m not exactly a sports aficionado. But I’m guessing it’s safe to presume that most games are expected to be noisy.
Apparently, though, South African soccer fans take such noise to a new ear-piercing level, enthusiastically blowing vuvuzelas in the stadiums. What’s a vuvuzela? Well, I know from oboes, but not from vuvuzelas. However, I’ve just learned they’re cacophonous, droning, deafening horns (blown like a brass instrument) that are driving TV World Cup viewers insane.
Vive Vuvuzelas? Please, No! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Attempting to watch World Cup soccer?
Then you’re likely to go off your rocker:
Vuvuzelas abound
With their loud, droning sound.
They are deafening. Help! Need a blocker!
Tags: Brass Players, Football Humor, Hearing Loss, June Holidays, Musical Instruments, Noise Humor, Soccer Fans, Soccer Stadiums, South Africa, Sports Humor, Television Limerick, Vuvuzela, World Cup
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Sports Humor, Television (TV) Humor | 9 Comments »
Wednesday, May 12th, 2010
I couldn’t let International Limerick Day go by without posting a new limerick prompt, could I? So I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A romantic young fellow named Will…
Here’s mine:
Romantic Verse
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A romantic young fellow named Will
Was in love with a woman named Jill.
He proposed on his knees,
But then started to sneeze.
Perhaps he should phone Dr. Phil.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.
Related Post: Romancing The Stoic
Tags: Dr. Phil, Marriage Limerick, National Limerick Day, Poetry & Prompts, Psychology Humor, Relationship, Romance Humor, Wedding Proposal Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Battle of the Sexes, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Relationship Humor, Romance Humor | 31 Comments »
Sunday, March 14th, 2010
Are you as sick as I am of our twice-yearly clock-adjustment ritual? Do you think, as I do, that we have more than enough daylight and that there’s no need to save any?
I’m sorry, but my internal clock is sufficiently confused and doesn’t need Daylight Savings Time to make my chronic insomnia even worse. And I’m inclined to clock the next person who reminds me to change my damn clocks.
Save Me From Daylight Savings Time (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My natural clock is a mess.
Just thinking of sleep gives me stress.
Spring forward—fall back
Makes me more out of whack.
So I don’t change my clocks — I just guess.
(More DST humor here.)
Tags: Clocks Limerick, Daylight Savings Time, DST Humor, Holiday Poetry, Insomnia Humor, March Holidays, Standard Time, Time Humor, Time Verse
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Celebrations Poetry, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Holiday Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Seasons Humor, Sleep & Insomnia Humor, Time Humor | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, March 9th, 2010
In simpler (pre-social networking) days, I suffered from just one web addiction — checking my email. And that was bad enough.
But now it’s Facebook and Twitter and blogging, oh my!
And for some people, it’s even worse. I guess I should be relieved that I don’t especially dig Digg, and that MySpace hasn’t invaded my brain space. And that (so far, at least) I’ve withstood the lure of most of the social networking and social media websites listed here in all their gory glory.
Because, as you can tell from this limerick, I don’t need any more web obsessions:
Feed Needs
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m addicted to Facebook, it’s true,
And Twitter and weblogging too.
I’m desp’rately hooked.
All my hours are booked
On my quest to be fed something new.
Tags: Blogging Obsession, Email Limerick, Facebook Limerick, Social Media Poetry, Social Networking Humor, Twitter Verse, Web Addict
Posted in Addiction Humor, Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Blogging Humor, Communication Humor, Computer Humor, Email Humor, Facebook Humor, Internet Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Social Satire, Technology Humor, Time Humor, Twitter Humor | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, March 2nd, 2010
Dear Press: Clean Up Your Own Damn Mess! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
We get headlines each March from the press:
“It’s Spring — Time To Clean Up Your Mess.”
Seems they’re too dumb to know
That we’re still getting snow.
Dear journos, stop giving me stress!
Related Post: Guilt Springs Eternal
Tags: House & Home, Household Chores, March Holidays, Media Limerick, Seasonal Verse, Spring Cleaning, Stress Humor, Weather Poem
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Chores Humor, House & Home Humor, Limericks, Media Humor, Seasons Humor, Weather Humor | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, November 10th, 2009
Ode To Cappuccino (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When my hot cappuccino’s denied me,
I am steamed. I must have it inside me.
So beware of my ire.
My need is quite dire.
Espresso/foamed milk, or else hide me!
UPDATE: I just found out that National Espresso Day is celebrated on November 23rd.
Tags: Addiction Poem, Cappuccino Limerick, Coffee Drinks Humor, Espresso Verse, Mood Humor, National Espresso Day
Posted in Addiction Humor, Anxiety & Stress, Food & Drink Humor, Mental Health Humor, Odd Holidays | 3 Comments »
Thursday, June 18th, 2009
Empty Nest (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman was feeling depressed.
(Her syndrome is called “empty nest.”)
Her home was too calm.
She missed being a mom—
Though her spouse “helped” by being a pest.
Feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, please join my friends in that same activity in my limerick-offs.
Tags: Depression, Empty Nest Syndrome, Family, House & Home, Husbands, Limericks, Mental Health, Parenting, Writing Prompts
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Battle of the Sexes, Children Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, House & Home Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Mental Health Humor | 19 Comments »
Thursday, May 21st, 2009
Doc Mockery (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A nervous young fellow named Phil
Asked his doc if he needed a will.
He responded, “Don’t worry,
But kindly go hurry
And pay up your overdue bill.”
Update: Happy National Doctors’ Day! (March 30th)
Tags: Bills, Doctors, Doctors Humor, Health, Law, March Holidays, Medicine, Money, National Doctors Day, Odd Holidays, Patients, Wills
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Poetry & Prompts | Comments Off on Doc Mockery
Friday, April 18th, 2008
Ode To An Earthquake (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It’s ’71. I awake
In LA to a 6.6 quake.
I feel nothing but terror
And curse out my error
In moving here. What a mistake!
Note: I graduated from Cal Arts in 1971. Great school, but I could definitely have done without that terrifying earthquake.
Tags: Cal Arts Limerick, California Institute Of The Arts, Earthquake Humor, LA Poetry, Los Angeles Poem, Natural Disasters
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, California Humor, Education & School Humor, History Humor, Limericks, Science Humor, Sleep & Insomnia Humor | 6 Comments »
Friday, February 22nd, 2008
Today’s limerick and haiku theme is time. First, my limerick:
No Time To Say Hello, Goodbye…
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m late and I can’t miss this train!
It’s arrived, and I’m here, yet in vain:
I must climb down these stairs,
But some guys, broad as bears,
Have me blocked—all my plans down the drain.
And now it’s time for my time-related haiku:
Time passes too fast.
I’d surely bitch about it,
If I just had time.
And now it’s your turn. Your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to write a limerick or haiku (or both) about time. When you’ve posted your verse, please return here and add a direct link to your themed poetry.
(If you need some tips on limerick or haiku writing, I link to some helpful sites here.)
Tags: Commuting Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Time Pressures, Train Travel
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Commuting Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Time Humor, Travel Humor | 12 Comments »
Friday, October 26th, 2007
This week’s 3 Word Wednesday words are Care, Unexpected, and Weekend. Somehow they eventually managed to fit inside a limerick:
Possibly Good, Albeit Annoying Advice (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Ev’ry weekend take time to forget
All your worries and cares and your debt.
Please don’t aim for perfected.
Embrace unexpected.
Try yoga. Play Set. Buy a pet.
Tags: Advice, Anxiety, Minimalism, Yoga
Posted in Advice Humor & Poems, Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Health & Medical Humor, Leisure Time Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Minimalist Humor | 6 Comments »
Monday, October 22nd, 2007
I love a good challenge, and Tricia at Miss Rumphius has provided a tough one: Write a poem that begins with one of five preexisting lines. I’ve written both a limerick and a four-liner, altering the limerick’s first line a bit so it conforms to limerick rhythm rules.
Here’s my limerick:
Time Travel
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Please stop all the clocks. Cut the phone.
Pull the plug on each ’puter you own.
Ain’t the silence sublime
As you go back in time?
With your thoughts you’re at last all alone.
And here’s my four-liner:
I wandered lonely as a cloud,
While wondering why I felt so cowed
By life, while others lived unbowed.
Must be like them, I vowed, aloud.
UPDATE: My limerick seems appropriate for Simplicity Day, celebrated July 12th in honor of Henry David Thoreau’s birthday.
Tags: Henry David Thoreau, July Holidays, Mind & Spirit, Minimalism, Odd Holidays, Simplicity Day, Technology Limerick, Time Travel
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Mental Health Humor, Minimalist Humor, Odd Holidays, Technology Humor, Telephone Humor, Time Humor | 15 Comments »
Monday, September 24th, 2007
I dedicate this to everyone’s who’s ever been driven mad by a website or blog outage:
Web Withdrawal Woes (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This outage has led me to think
I’ve gone bonkers, berserk—need a shrink.
I keep checking the site.
It’s still down—what a plight!
Web withdrawal may drive me to drink.
Tags: Addiction Humor, Computers, Internet Limerick, Net Addict, Net Humor, Psychology Humor, Site Outage Poem, Techie Humor, Technology Verse, Web Addict, Web Humor, Web Withdrawal
Posted in Addiction Humor, Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Internet Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Technology Humor | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, July 18th, 2007
Website owners, webmasters, and people who specialize in search engine optimization (SEO) and search engine marketing (SEM) tend to be an obsessive bunch, perpetually checking stats in their quest for better numbers. What do improved numbers mean? In theory, they beget better placement in search engine results pages (SERPS), more sales, and higher ad rates.
This obsession tends to reach a frenzied peak roughly four times a year, when Google’s Toolbar is updated, and you learn if your latest PageRank has risen or (heaven forbid) dropped. And while some may claim that they don’t care about PageRank, nobody believes them.
In honor of Google PageRank update season, which apparently is upon us, I’ve written this limerick:
Ode To The Google PageRank Obsession
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Google PageRank obsession is back,
‘Cause an update is due, which we track.
Have our efforts paid off?
Although many will scoff,
We need proof that we’re leading the pack.
(You can find more of my computer and technology humor and limericks here, including my song parody Webmaster’s SEO Complaint.)
Tags: Google Humor, Google Limerick, Net Humor, PageRank Satire, PR Update Humor, Rank Obsession, Search Engine Limerick, SEM Humor, SEO Humor, SERPS, Web Humor, Webmaster Humor
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Google, Internet Humor, Limericks, Search Engine Tools, Technology Humor | 4 Comments »
Thursday, July 12th, 2007
Pity The Poor Lawyer
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Your billable hours are low,”
Said the partner. “They simply must grow.
It behooves you to hike them
Or better, please spike them.
To lunch breaks and sleep, just say no!”
(This is but one of many reasons why I’m a “recovering lawyer.” You can find more of my law humor here.)
Tags: Billable Hours, Law Partner, Lawyer Limerick, Lunch Breaks, Work Satire, Workplace Limerick
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Business Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Workplace & Career Humor | 4 Comments »
Wednesday, July 4th, 2007
A Modest Dating Proposal For Anxious Guys (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Introducing your gal to your mom?
Are you worried your intro will bomb?
Well here’s some advice
So the meeting goes nice:
First tell her your date’s name is Tom.
Tags: Dates, Dating, Gender Issues, Introductions, Meetings, Modest Proposal, Moms, Mothers, Parenting, Parents
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Battle of the Sexes, Dating Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Limericks, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Relationship Humor, Social Satire | Comments Off on A Modest Dating Proposal For Anxious Guys
