Choice Viewing (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
What with networks and Netflix and cable
And Hulu and Amazon’s stable
Of shows to be seen,
I’m too wired to screen;
Feeling feeble, can’t pick — kindly table.
Choice Viewing (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
What with networks and Netflix and cable
And Hulu and Amazon’s stable
Of shows to be seen,
I’m too wired to screen;
Feeling feeble, can’t pick — kindly table.
I’m sensing the usual stress–
Nothing more, but alas, nothing less.
“Stress Awareness Day’s” here–
Not a day that I’d cheer.
Screw “awareness!” I’d rather repress.
Hiding In Verse (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow was trying to hide
From problems he could not abide.
So he tossed off some verse,
Which made things far worse…
For his muse wasn’t taking his side.
May I Panic Yet? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m trying quite hard not to panic,
But poll trends are making me manic.
Prospects never looked great,
And it seems now that fate
Has ensnared us inside the Titanic.
When I’m looking for limerick ideas, I sometimes visit idiom list sites, like this one. Then I’ll select an idiom that might work meter-wise and that ends with a common rhyme sound.
And so today, I challenged myself to write a limerick that contains the phrase “dry run.” Unconsciously inspired, perhaps, by the inept roll-out of Obamacare, I wrote these two lines:
A software firm held a dry run
But the coding, alas, wasn’t done…
I swiftly thought up an acceptable “B-rhyme,” but then got stuck at line 5. The best I could come up with was an ending that employed yet another idiom: “under the gun.” But I still couldn’t think of a line 5 that was even slightly clever.
And then I got an idea: create some wordplay by revising another line, adding specificity to the subject matter. Here’s the result:
Limerick Dry Run
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A software firm held a dry run,
But the arms-tracking code wasn’t done.
It failed test after test,
Till the owner confessed:
“I’m too stressed to work under the gun.”
If being wrapped in pythons would enhance your massage experience, do I have a spa for you! Get yourself right over to the Bali Heritage Reflexology and Spa in Jakarta, Indonesia, which claims that snake-draping combats stress.
A Spa To Hiss (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Oh joy! Here’s a spa to avoid:
When massaging you, snakes are deployed.
Yes, they drape you in snakes,
Claiming fear aids your aches.
You feel great … right until you’re destroyed.
Happy Information Overload Day! (October 20, 2015)
Limerick Ode To Information Overload (3-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Too much data is haunting my dreams–
Excess info and too many memes.
Overloaded with news,
My brain has the blues:
“I’m cluttered with tidbits,” it screams.
So what’s the solution pray tell
That will free me from info-stress hell?
Turn off ev’ry machine
And device? That sounds mean
And quite limiting. Not a good sell!
Is there anything else I can do?
I suppose I could hide in the loo.
But alas and alack,
That room has a stack
Of old weeklies — a factoid fondue.
***
Update: The first Friday of March is the National Day of Unplugging.
In Praise Of Frustration (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My muse is unleashed by frustration
And foiled by excessive elation.
When I’m irked or irate
I’m more prone to create,
While repose sends my muse on vacation.
(DVerse Poets wants to know what inspires our writing.)
Karaoke isn’t my thing because my singing voice is lousy. (Alas, there’s no connection between being able to play the oboe and having a dulcet singing voice.)
But since it’s National Karaoke Week (celebrated each year during the 4th week of April) I couldn’t resist posting this silly limerick:
Limerick Ode To Karaoke
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There are people whose singing is croaky.
Some are pitchy — too high or too low-key.
But no matter your voice,
Almost all can rejoice
In this musical fun: Karaoke.
Brian over at DVerse Poets asks us why we write:
Why I Write Limericks (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I write cuz I don’t have a choice.
I’m simply compelled to give voice
To distress through my humor:
This angst-ridden boomer
Must in whimsy and lim’ricks rejoice.
Wonder Wednesday, over at Poets United, prompts us to write a poem about bridges or bridging gaps. I decided to cross that bridge with a limerick:
Knotty Negotiations
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It’s a challenge to bridge the large gap
Between parties who’d rather just flap
And complain that they’re right,
While their rivals just fight
Cuz they’re mean. So I’d rather just nap.
This month Acrostic Only asks for an acrostic limerick featuring the word ANGST. (An acrostic limerick spells out a word via the first letter of each line.)
So now you know why this limerick is definitely NOT funny:
Angst-Ridden Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Anxiety, fear, apprehension
Neurotically fill me with tension.
Getting out of my chair—
Somehow going somewhere
Tends to help with depression prevention.
One of my favorite weekly prompts is Three Word Wednesday. This week, it asks us to use the following three words in any sort of poem: Crumble, Drawn and Uneasy. Well, I managed to squeeze them all into this limerick:
A Game Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A chess player, looking quite drawn,
Was caught in an uneasy yawn.
“My game skills have crumbled,”
The man weakly mumbled.
“I feel like I’m naught but a pawn.”
UPDATE: July 20th is International Chess Day, and the 2nd Saturday of October is National Chess Day.
Embedded In Sleeplessness (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Insomnia blankets my night.
Slumber teases — declines to alight.
I toss and I turn
In my bed, as I yearn
For release from my sleep-deprived plight.
(Prompted by Theme Thursday’s “beds.”)
Are you all ready for National Pet Owners Independence Day?
A gal who’d been cleaning was jarred
By some leaves just dragged in from her yard.
Displaying a broom,
She yelled, “Sweep up this room!”
To her dog. (Guess she’s working too hard.)
In-Box Overload (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My in-box is filled to the brim.
The sight of it’s making me grim.
And my virtual box
Is likewise a pox.
Mail has stamped out my zip and my vim.
(Prompted By One Single Impression’s “Inbox.”)
Related Post: Email Hell
DVerse prompts us to write about nightmares. Here’s my response:
A Poet’s Nightmare (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal had a frightening dream.
It featured her muse — made her scream:
Said her muse, “You must write
About terror tonight
And forever, cuz nightmare’s your theme.”
Sleep-Deprived Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
An inventor was trying to nap,
But snoozing just wasn’t on tap.
His constant fixation
With tech innovation
Required a sleep-prompting app.
(Author’s Note: I’m not an inventor, but I’m a life-long insomniac who could use such an application.)