Lame Limerick
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A guy with his foot in a cast…
Here’s mine:
Lame Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A guy with his foot in a cast
Was driving his car way too fast.
His wheel struck a hole.
He lost all control,
And the time for a cast was surpassed.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.
Tags: Accident Poem, Automobile Humor, Car Limerick, Death Limerick, Health Limericks, Injury Verse, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
A guy with his foot in a cast,
Ran a marathon, really half-assed
He failed to master
Running in plaster,
And ended up finishing last
A guy with his foot in a cast
Once tried to race his car fast.
When acceleration
Went past expectation
He broke his other foot, and his arms, and his clavicle, and most everything else, and swore that if he ever wrote a limerick about it, he’d write one so awful it would never be surpassed.
A guy with his foot in a cast
Formed it as Jesus holding a mast.
He flew as he sinned,
on each freshening wind,
and enjoyed being an iconoclast.
A guy with his foot in a cast
Thought he was a quick healer–really fast.
He struggled back to work
Where they knew he was a jerk
He even made it to Happy Hour last.
The pain was so great he was wincing
His poker face wasn’t convincing
His foot was a-swellin’
By 8:00 he was a-yellin’
And no dirty words was he mincing!
The ambulance drivers being tough
They handled him hard and so rough
They knew he needed his cast off
But once he had brassed off
They, both of them, had had quite enough.
The drivers were used to men screaming
But they sought traffic that was teeming.
Taking side streets, not highway,
Going slowly, singing, “I did it my way”
They rendered our casted friend steaming!
The moral to the story, my friend,
Is that, though often bitter, in the end,
Whether pained or maligned
Hold your anger and be kind
To those upon whom you depend.
A guy with his foot in a cast
Chose to conquer the mizzenmast
It was to be a short climb
Gaining a foot at a time
But losing two slithering down fast
Said a guy with his foot in a cast
“This time it is certainly the last
That, while crossing the street,
I’ll send out a tweet
And tune in an iTunes podcast.”
A guy with his foot in a cast
Told his team at his bedside amassed
“My buddies, you bet
I’m filled with regret
For rushing when I should have passed”
These are great fun! Thanks everyone. And please keep them coming!
A guy with his foot in a cast
Underneath had an itch quite steadfast
His frustration and anger
Made him untwist a hanger
Such relief! He’s no longer harassed!
A guy with his foot in a cast
Asked his mate to raise up his low mast.
She cranked for good measure
And tendered much pleasure.
Now if only the captain could last.
A guy with his foot in a cast
R’joiced o’re Doc’s order – “Bedfast”
He’d oft jog before dinner
And though this made him thinner
His true d’votion to running? Half-assed.
A guy with his foot in a cast
got it caught in the line of a mast
they called him a wimp
waving around his limp
while they shot him with cannon blast.
A guy with his foot in a cast
Sat down for a gourmet repast;
When later, his lover,
Sought him under cover,
She discovered he was really gassed.
A guy with his foot in a cast
Thought his ball-playing days in the past.
But with his foot hard and thicker
They made him a kicker;
At field goals he reigned unsurpassed.
David Vitter has told us his view
As always, he hasn’t a clue
Those who doubt Barack’s birth
Are the dumbest on earth
But then I’m not saying anything new.
Thanks everyone. These are great fun. And Jeff, I think you meant to post this on my other blog’s Vitter post.
A guy with his foot in a cast
Rode a time machine into the past
When he fell off the roof.
By undoing his goof,
He returned home uncasted at last.
hello Mad Kane~ you made a nice limerick with your line above. here’s mine… hope all is well.
a guy with his foot in a cast
stopped for a drink at last.
his ex wife there to greet
with a laugh not so discreet
was kicked and left aghast.
a story,
a poem,
together,
a limerick,
what smart and beautiful combination!
;)