Rehab For Serial Wife-Cheating? Bullox!
I don’t know about you, but I’m not buying Jesse James’ (or Tiger Woods’) rehab ploy:
Rehab For Serial Wife-Cheating? Bullox! (Double Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A bike-loving fellow named James
Had affairs with some numerous dames.
Though wife Sandra’s a winner,
He’s trying to spin her:
Addiction’s the problem, he claims.
Now he’s paying a whole lot of loot
For therapy — Tiger Woods’ route.
But rehab won’t fix
Those wife-cheating pricks.
My advice — just give both guys the boot.
Tags: Addiction Humor, Celebrities, Celebrity Marriages, Elin Nordegren, Feminism Humor, Jesse James, Motorcycles, Rehab, Sandra Bullock, Serial Cheaters, Tiger Woods
Haha, good ones – and I totally agree with that. Kick ’em both to the curb.
Coming at you from Google, to try posting. I have done a large collection of safety hints, in limerick form. You might call them limerbituaries. Would you care to contribute one for posterity in my “literary last effects”?
Swimming is great but not alone,
but Hector did, that much is known.
No one could miss him
on his solo swim,
that’s why his name adorns this stone!
I wonder what they do in cheating rehab. Pray to the Lord for forgiveness? Hit on the hot nurses, who admonish them and hence reform them?
Thanks for your comments, everyone! And Gerald, I’m glad you were finally able to post here. As for your “limerbituaries,” I gave your tombstone limerick idea a try.
Received your two wonderful examples of limerabituaries, and will add them to my collection somewhat scheduled for publication. I will include yours, with annotation and linkage. You have a great facility for wryme, and I revel in your postings. I still must go through Google to post to your site.
ALLIGATORS
Some people wear their lovely hide
as fancy shoes upon their feet.
They’d like our feet in their inside,
since they think we are a treat.
Alligators, I have not tried.
as neither shoes or food to eat.
A simple reason, don’t you see,
I won’t eat what could eat me.
From “What’s Gnu at my Zoo”
So glad you enjoyed them, Gerald. Thanks very much! Enjoyed Alligators. Perfect punch!
Gerald, your Alligator is a bit of Ogden Nash there. This kind of stuff is addictive, isn’t it?
Here comes the ultimate playa hater
The OG — all jaws — the alligator
You think that you’re such a cute li’l tomater?
Snap! Tip to toe, you’re all dressed in gator
How do you look in your live gator suit?
A lengthwise lunch, not some slick pair of boots
That’s why I don’t choose to put on the hide
Of that which could easily wear me inside.
But back to the original subject.
Tiger, Tiger, burning bright
Flush with cash and corporate might
What immortal fantasy
Made you suppose that you could be,
As player, playa, and playee,
Immune from public scrutiny?
All over town you dipped yo’ wizzle
And now you played yourself, fo’ shizzle.