Spring Limerick Contest — With Money Prizes
Writing my Is It Spring Yet? limerick gave me an idea to launch the first of what I hope will be many limerick writing contests.
So here’s my challenge: Write a limerick related somehow to the subject of spring and post it here in my comments. I’ll announce the winners on the first day of spring. The first prize will be $25. The second prize will be $10. Both prizes will be paid via PayPal.
I’m looking forward to reading your entries!
UPDATE: This contest is officially closed and the spring limerick contest winners and their winning entries are here.
Please check back on this blog in mid-April, when I expect to announce a new limerick contest.
Tags: Limerick Contest, March Holidays, Spring Limericks, Writing Contests
Though it’s cold, I find winter infernal–
Its dim, lifeless stay seems eternal.
Take this hiemal night!
Give me growth, life and light:
My favorite days are the vernal.
A helix-shaped metal-wire thing
That protrudes from your sofa may bring
From your mouth a mild curse,
Or (and what could be worse?)
Make you shout “How I hate this damned Spring!”
I did a post about this at Poets Who Blog. Good luck with the contest. Thanks for the heads up about it.
Sweet Spring, we offer this prayer to you,
May our spirits you bless and renew,
(Though these damn allergies
Won’t stop making me sneeze)
We bend down on our knees and… ACHOO!
My water is tasty. I sing
Of its freshness, its flavor, its zing.
I’ve avoided the fable
You get on a label.
No bottle or tap–just a spring.
It is Spring! The weather’s getting warm;
It is time to display our team’s form!
But what is this note,
That our coach just wrote?
Ah, nuts – “Game called on account of storm.”
There’s a skip and a spring in my stride
When the peach blossom’s heavy and wide,
And the soft falling rains
Plant new hope in my veins
For the good things that Spring will provide.
From the tent of the bold fedayeen
Came the screech of his wife, Bernadine.
“See this dirt, dust and fluff?
There’s twelve months of the stuff,
And it’s your turn to do the spring-clean!”
It was Spring, and a certain youth’s fancy
Lightly turned to a young lass named Nancy.
“Not this lifetime!” she said.
He considered, “While dead?
She knows necro(ulp!)mancy? Too chancy!”
It’s Spring and the garden does beckon.
Time to plant all my herbs now, I reckon.
Got out seeds and my hoe–
What?! It’s starting to snow?
It IS April 6th? Yeah! Just checkin’…
(sigh)
When a fall leaves your arm in a sling
(Some are warm, causing rashes that sting)
It’s no fun skating in
To see doctors. Your twin
Turns to love, and you snap like a spring.
Or, if you don’t like wordplay so much, try this one:
March is time to start up the Toyota;
Say “So long, see you soon Sarasota”.
To the north we will go,
To the blizzards and snow
Where the winter ends late–Minnesota.
The lifting of winter’s bleak pall
Brings so many things to us all.
But in glorious Spring,
My favorite thing,
Is the sound of the umpire: Play Ball!
It’s only a matter of hours
the yearly re-birth is near
here come the birds and the flowers
Yes! Spring is about to appear!
Sure, it’s been a hard winter..
we’ve suffered the snow and the cold
be thankful for this weather
It’s on the way out, I am told.
tis the time of the year
warmer weather is near
earth’s wearin ‘o the green
not summer or winter
let me be the hinter
one of two seasons between
it gurgles, it flounces
it actually bounces
it causes your spirit to sing
the day of St Patrick
may be anti-climatic
in the dawning of the spring.
I’ve got two:
Spring in the Northwest if a gift
Despite rain, it gives spirits a lift
Daffodils fill our quiver
While bald eagles fish the river
So who cares if summer starts August 5th?
It is spring, and Dubya sobs,
“I thought impeachment was just for blowjobs!”
But he lied about war,
Canning lawers, and more
So he’ll spend summer facing the mobs.
My favorite season is Spring
With senses that tingle and sing
We’re all feeling happy
The trees get all sappy
And so does my hubby – and “thing”
To my wife:
Flight of fancy, my love taking wing
Joins the jaybirds and bluebirds that sing
As the days burgeon long —
Hear my heart beating strong
For my darling. I love you. It’s spring!
OK. OK. Bring out the pancakes. :)
Thanks so much for all these delightful entiries, and please keep them coming. I’ll be accepting submissions right up to my winners’ announcement on the first day of spring.
As a young man (and that is the thing)
My fancy turned lightly to–SCHWING!
Nature’s vim can surprise;
Even my sap would rise.
And that’s why they call this time “Spring”.
The springtime we’ve longed for is near,
which so many gardeners hold dear;
yet, when on mayflies we glide
in that unpleasant slide,
we wish another season were here.
There once was a fellow named Will
who had plucked up a soft daffodil.
From beneath the grey bower
he found the sweet flower
that signaled his seasonal ill.
That “Sproing!” that we hear is the sound
As our greenery springs from the ground.
Every Spring, there’s a chance
We’ll get rioting plants,
When their mainsprings get overly wound.
From snowstorms we’re shifting our focus.
Rainy April’s beginning to soak us.
Our garden’s the locus
Of spring hocus-pocus:
The magical surge of the crocus.
Your bedsprings announce you’re pursuing
Some frenzied and passionate screwing.
Are your neighbors next door,
And the ones down a floor,
Keeping score?—’cuz they’re sure what you’re doing!
Well, I think that I have been misled —
I’ve sought signs of the season ahead,
But each lim’rick that’s passed
(More risqué than the last)
Says the place to find Spring is in bed!
In case anybody’s wondering, my original intention was to hold a contest for limericks about the season of spring. But clever poets soon noticed a loophole in my slightly ambiguous announcement and started posting limericks about other types of spring.
The upshot is I’m considering them all eligible. In fact, I’m almost glad it happened. The topical variety makes it even more fun … for me, at least.
By the way, this contest is going so well, I’ve decided to hold limerick writing contests regularly — roughly once a month. And yes, there will be money prizes each time. :)
I’m not ready to announce the next one quite yet but — hint, hint — the topics will be tax filing and money.
Thanks again for all these delightul entries and please keep them coming!
Last March while I was knee deep in snow,
I decided that ’twas time to blow,
So I left the Northeast,
And I must say I’m pleased.
Snow in Florida is unknown.
Madeline:
thanks in advance./.. maybe this belongs on your political blog?
Springtime
Springtime
The Ice is slowly thawing
Soon, insurgents will be out clawing.
Now our rifles aren’t shooting,
Soon our hummers will be out rooting
Spring has sprung. Afghanistan’s fine
Bagdad is peaceful, wait – that’s some mighty strong wine!
Like our brothers in Bagdad, we’re under-deployed here.
We haven’t the numbers nor even the commitment.
The President and his boys rushed us in then out here.
Without proper weapons, training, tools, or the like.
Now we try and try to rebuild the country here,
With all the bombs, with which we still need to deal
Politics must also be considered
’cause like Iraq, force alone, just won’t do.
But at least the weather’s not freezing
Or hot, like summer’s icky stew.
Now, all we need to fear is the Taliban,
Whose fighters now go fighting in their turbans.
Maybe by this time next year, we’ll be home, I pray
So family so precious, can again grow and play.
Through the winter I slog and I schlep,
But in spring there’s a spring in my step.
All the birds are in song,
And I’m singing along
With a throat that is strong…and not strep.
In Florida there are attractions
that tourist’s money take
they offer satisfactions
there’s one they call…
Spring Break!
some of us grew up with seasons…
winter, spring, summer, fall.
now, for various reasons…
it’s now ‘one size fits all’…
there used to be a difference
a time when things would change
and now we die by increments
mankind, have you no shame?
It’s YOU who’ve caused calamity
through gluttony and greed
thriving on insanity
unaware of your deed
too late? you ask, “to save the day?”
Can we change the course in time?
Some say it will happen anyway…
and take pleasure in a rhyme
for once your born,you’re bound to die
the matter is forsworn
let’s join hands and at least try
we don’t have time to mourn
(I’m sorry for the tone…it just came out that’a’way..)
Oh how Billy Bob hates the spring
Every year it’s the same old thing
He must take a bath
Or face his wife’s wrath
But good gracious that soap does sting
I sneeze when white crystals are falling
But I know that soon spring will be calling
I welcome the breeze
But then once again sneeze
For allergic am I to the pollen
As I look through my frozen glass window
I am cursing the ice the north wind blows
Then God whispers to me
There’s a promise of spring
And I dream of a warmer tomorrow
Like a child I am rolling in clover
As I wrestle with my boxer, Rover
He pauses to bark
And here’s his remark
“Man, am I glad winter’s over!”
As I roll down my favorite hill
My senses ecstatically filled
I pucker my lips
And bend down to kiss
A fuzzy old groundhog named Phil
Blossoms bloom, we’re in love, and it’s Spring!
How delightful, you’re going to sing!
You’re as sweet as a flower,
Yet I’m suddenly sour
As you say, “And now something by Sting. . .”
In the past the days were quite brief,
The dark took our time like a thief,
Then came April showers,
The world filled with flowers,
Finally it’s spring: ah…relief!
Limerick contest…
Madeleine Kane is having a limerick contest. If you have, or think you can write, a limerick about spring, and you’re interested in cash prizes, why ……
In winter the cool Gulf breeze blows
with the beach sand all up in my toes
But in Spring I do not
’cause it’s too goddam hot
and I can’t remove any more clothes
During winter I’d oft clean my plate,
And say “This spring, I’ll work off what I ate.”
But come April Fifteen,
It’s not me that is lean,
It’s my wallet that’s lost all the weight!
Dear Earthworms
Spring’s the season that poor earthworms hate:
Hungry robins abound! Yikes – fish bait!
For dirt dwellers, this tip
(a Shel Silverstein quip):
To outwit early birdies…SLEEP LATE!
YARD SALE
It’s a Yard Sale (or, springtime infection
causing folks to do detailed inspection
of some other clod’s junk,
which they load in their trunk)
– call it Saturday Garbage Collection!
SPRING TRAINING
Hopeful players whose names you can’t say:
Star-struck rookies – with THEIR chance to play.
Assigned numbers more fitting
for linebacker hitting…
(demoted by Opening Day).
This entry was posted in the comments of the wrong post, so I’m reposting it here for its author:
Carol June Hooker Says:
March 15th, 2007 at 8:03 pm
Stop it, Rain, Snow, and Sleet! Skip it, Hail!
Et tu, Brutal Wind, why the Gale?
Ides of March Day portends
That, though Wintertime ends,
Spring’s in Meteorological Jail.
Now in spring, sun begins to revive
My sleepy and long-frozen drive.
Warmly kissing my pate
She remembers to mate…
So the wonderful game came alive.
When will spring start up
Thenl the snow gives up
And the sun come out to play
Skys stop being cold & grey
And we’ll all come up trumps
Passion’s flames have died down to an ember:
She is April; I’m chill December.
It’s a rather sad thing
To remember one’s Spring
When there’s not much spring left in one’s member.
(Rated PG and posted with permission of MK.)
I watch wistfully birds on the wing,
And I wish for wisteria in spring.
My summer’s a-going
And autumn’s a-blowing.
Wet winter brings icy cold zing.
Such is life in the Southern Hemisphere ;)
I awoke to the sound of a bird
In the tree by my window. Absurd!
He was singing a song,
But he had it all wrong:
It was only December the third.
:-(
It’s springtime, which means that my fancy
Is turning to thoughts of my Nancy.
But marry this summer?
I’d have to be dumber;
Her husband would kill us! Too chancy!
(Sorry, turnip.)
You say spring has begun? Maybe so,
But that stuff in our driveway is snow.
Ain’t no leaves on the trees,
There’s a northerly breeze,
And outside, it’s still twenty below!
May walked home with a spring in her step.
She loved Spring and was so full of pep!
Then came those darn showers,
The ones for the flowers–
Caught a chill; now she’s laid up with strep.
The lilacs and peonies bloom.
The sun starts to break through the gloom.
In tank tops and tight running shorts
Hot men pursue outdoor sports
Before coming back to my room.
warm spring reigns supreme
a time for love and hope
awash in colors meadows gleam
a season birds denote
The spring is a blossoming season
That’s always refreshingly pleasin’.
And the best part of all?
That from now until fall,
Needn’t frequently fret about freezin’.
After a long summer of war plans misguided,
the fall election finally provided
a winter congress that was free
of single party decree
and a beautiful spring of government divided.
there’s a rhythm to the cycle
as we orbit our bright star
and no matter what your title
no matter who you are
you will know the season’s changing
when the birds begin to sing
and the earth is rearranging
her bouquet to show you spring.
“Spring in the air!”, I called out
To the old man while walking without.
“You can spring in the air,
I really don’t care,
But I can’t – I’m riddled with gout!”
This contest is officially closed and the
spring limerick contest winners and their winning entries are here.
Please check back on this blog in mid-April, when I expect to announce a new limerick contest.
Carnival of Divided Government UNDECIMUS – Springtime for Divided Government Edition…
In celebration of this very special spring, and without further ado, we offer a bit of verse…
Ode to a Divided Spring
After a summer of war plans misguided,
The fall election finally provided –
A winter Congress that was free
Of single party dec…
There was an old blogger named bill,
Who blogged all day long for the thrill,
Subject no matter, whatever the patter,
But really, quite run of the mill.
If there were no winter there could be no spring,
no summer to follow, no autumn to colour,
no bird to sing, no tree to blossom no joy to bring.
[…] The response to my spring limerick contest exceeded my wildest hopes – nearly 60 poems were submitted. In fact, there were so many wonderful entries — some poignant, some laugh-out-loud funny — that it was hard to select the winners. […]