In A Pig’s Eye!
I rarely write science-related limericks. But I just couldn’t resist this headline: “‘Humans evolved after a female chimpanzee mated with a pig’: Extraordinary claim made by American geneticist.”
In A Pig’s Eye!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
You might ask how a masculine pig
Got a chimp that was female to dig
Him enough to have sex.
I’m guessing a hex,
Using feathers and maybe a fig.
Tags: Animal Verse, Bawdy Humor, Chimpanzee Limerick, Evolution Humor, Genetics Limerick Chimp Humor, Pig Humor, Science Humor, Scientific Research
A chimp and a pig found a place
For a tryst, so they cut to the chase.
Now what kind of god
Would devise such an odd
Conjugation to start a new race?
But Darwin would certainly doubt
That a coupling like that could work out.
It’s beyond hypothetical.
It’s downright heretical.
For a scientist, it has little clout.
So religion and science agree
That such mating could not come to be.
No ape would allow
Either hog or a sow
To bring fruit to its family tree.
Edited last verse:
A chimp and a pig found a place
For a tryst, so they cut to the chase.
Now what kind of god
Would devise such an odd
Conjugation to start a new race?
But Darwin would certainly doubt
That a coupling like that could work out.
It’s beyond hypothetical.
It’s downright heretical.
As science it has little clout.
So religion and science agree
That such mating could not come to be.
No ape would allow
Either hog or a sow
To bring fruit to its family tree.
Actually, the edit was the middle verse. Oy!
You might ask how a masculine pig
Persuaded a chimp – a sheila to dig
He promised the moon and sang her fine toons
And sometimes he gave her banana balloons
She continued to toil and the laundry did boil
in a great copper pot that was very very hot
As he sunbaked drank beer with his mermaids and chums
she slaved at home alone – was under his thumb
One day she said” enough is enough
I’m back to the jungle where life’s not so tough”
He said” Don’t leave me my dear little chimp
Who’ll do the cooking shopping and see to my limp”
“Who cares ” she said leaving in a rage
“I’m outta here now and turning the page
Back to the coconut palms sand and trees
Will live at the beach with a lovely sea breeze
Goes to show…most men are still pigs :)
I’m at a loss for words :-)
Lol – This is good!
There isn’t much science that can be linked to the original statement – a limerick is an excellent repost!
Of course the male in the equation just HAD to be the pig.
Was that American geneticist a woman, by chance? (LOL)
Well if Adam and Eve had Fig’s leaf.. there had to be a fig somewhere.
Mmm mmm mmm. That is a capital swine
who would go quite well with red wine
but she-chimp drank too much
which led he-pig to touch
and ultimately they had a good time
he mastered the art of seduction
applied with a bit of deduction
never needed insistence
to surmount resistance
for inter-species reproduction
its really quite a disturbing thought…ha.
funny too the filter at school kept kicking me out when
i tried to comment on this the other day…lol
so she swung from the trees
from morning til night
no shopping or cooking
a monkey’s delight
but after a while she became
tetchy and bored
she needed some company
started looking – Oh Lord!
one day at the beach
you wont guess who she found
all shiny and pinky and peachy and brown
I never thought of pigs as masculine. You startled me from the first line!
I feel more than a bit sorry for Ms Chimp.
I think a considerable amoount of cheap wine was needed too.