Off One’s Game Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow was way off his game…*

or

A woman was way off her game…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Off One’s Game (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow was way off his game
And was looking for someone to blame.
He concluded that God
Had given the nod
To his nemesis — talk about lame!

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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46 Responses to “Off One’s Game Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. Veralynne says:

    A gal who was way off her game
    Hoped no one’d remember her name
    As she strode the catwalk
    She could hear critics talk
    “Another model in heels’s come up lame!”

  2. Sally Ike Renfield says:

    Lol at yours; subtle dig at Tebow?

    A player was way off his game
    on Superbowl Sunday–a shame?
    Said: “I have to report
    that I’m just tired of sport.
    I’d rather write poems than maim.”

    Can you tell that A) we’re not sports people & 2) we’re already sick of the bowl coverage?

  3. Kathy El-Assal says:

    Poor Sarah was way off her game
    Going rogue when McCain brought her fame.
    Now her star it was Palin’
    She’d taken a nailin’
    For gaffes and faux pas she’d exclaim.

  4. A guy who was way off his game
    Left The Olympics in shame
    He said, “I’m too old
    “To go for the gold,
    “Perhaps I’ll just carry the flame”

  5. A fellow was way off his game;
    So taken by fortune and fame
    He went on a bender
    And fell off the end where
    He could not remember his name.

  6. A fellow was way off his game,
    Speed eating his once-claim-to-fame.
    While wolfing down pie
    Some seagulls flew by;
    What they dropped and his bite were the same.

  7. Pat Hatt says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    The fans booed and thought he was lame.
    He failed to catch the hit,
    Mind you he still took it.
    Right between the legs giving him turning point of the week fame.

  8. Hansi says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    When all his songs sounded the same
    He had no choice
    Cause he lost his voice
    And there went all his musical fame.

  9. Jim Delaney says:

    A fellow was way off his game —
    A hindrance he soon overcame.
    Though his entrails would quake
    Eating ‘gator or snake,
    He found chicken tastes almost the same.

  10. A Lim’ricker way off his game
    Tried to sneak into Mad’s Hall of Fame;
    But our Mad, standing sentry,
    Took one glance at his entry,
    Then said, “Thanks, but no thanks all the same!” :(

  11. scott says:

    A fellow was way off his game,
    when the ‘Notice of Child Support’ came.
    They had fun there’s no doubt,
    on that couch that pulled out.
    He wishes that he’d done the same.

  12. jesse levy says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    using pick-up lines totally lame
    The gals rolled their eyes
    at his tiresome tries
    Newt Gingrich was this fellow’s name.

  13. Other Mary says:

    lol, well done. And so often true as well!

  14. jesse levy says:

    A woman was way off her game
    (And she was a hot lookin’ dame)
    She was just out of sorts
    when she pulled off his shorts
    and just couldn’t light up his flame.

  15. Sally Franz says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    His wife said it was a shame
    But if you want this Mista
    You can’t have Callista
    I’ll take the kids and the house just the same

  16. sideview says:

    This gal was off her game
    She tried but no words came
    An impossible rhyme
    Words than entwine
    Oh what a shame

    sorry I tried and tried, the tiny mind was not co-operating

  17. John Larkin says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    and was looking for someone to blame.
    He yelled at his caddy,
    who said, “Knock it off, daddy.
    I’m not the one causing your shame.”

  18. Rinkly Rimes says:

    A fellow was well off his game,
    Having no luck with all types of dame.
    Devoid of all glamour
    He’d stutter and stammer
    And he never lit anyone’s flame!

  19. Thomas says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    he had missed by far, what a shame
    he thought for a while
    then did it Palin-style
    and used a helicopter for hunting fame

    (I am sure you didn’t mean THAT game)

  20. colonialist says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    And ruefully heard to exclaim,
    ‘My meat needs to be
    Less “off”, don’t you see?
    Can I pass the buck without blame?’

    Oh, rats! I see Thomas had the same take.

    A woman was way off her game –
    Her tricks were becoming too tame –
    Then got game to love
    With approach from above –
    Her service had been all to blame!

  21. Terri Brewer says:

    A woman was way off her game
    with only herself that she could blame
    got so drunk the night before
    ran head long into a door
    now she can’t remember her name!

  22. scott says:

    A woman was way off her game.
    Defunding PP was her aim.
    ‘Cuz she don’t really care,
    about women’s welfare,
    and Karen Handel is her name.

  23. daisy mae simon says:

    Cleopatra was off on her game
    So Caesar quite promptly laid claim
    Her delight had been botched
    ‘Til he played with her crotch
    Yes, he saw, he conquered, he came.

  24. hedgewitch says:

    An alien was way off its game
    and was frequently heard to proclaim
    its love for Newt Gingrich
    and his transcendent sales pitch
    for a new lunar colony domain.

  25. Cosmos Cami says:

    Putting football to poetry is a skill. :)

  26. Coming here via Real Toads, with my first submission to your Limerick-Off:
    *

    A fellow was way off his game
    And nothing was ever the same
    He could not find the ball
    It was nowhere at all
    So that was the end of his fame.
    *
    His number would not be retired
    As a coach he’d never be hired
    No, you can’t lead a game
    Without talents the same
    As those you have always admired.
    *
    Oh yes, he was way off his game
    To fame he could not lay a claim
    He’d not be in the hall
    With the winners and all
    Enshrined by the shirt with his name.
    *

    Kay, Alberta, Canada
    An Unfittie’s Guide to Adventurous Travel

  27. Granny Smith says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    Of finding wild beasts he could tame,
    But gained recognition
    (Though NOT by volition)
    When eaten by lions. That’s fame!

  28. Barbara Hobens says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    His youth long gone, not the same
    But he met a smart lady
    With a past a bit shady
    So come June she’ll be sharing his name.

  29. mary lyons says:

    Wingnutty Gal
    A gal who was way off her game
    Screamed, “Big Government is always to blame!”
    She never would mention
    Her own sweet state pension
    Or that Medicare’s paid her health claim.

  30. Versebender says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    With only the bottle to blame
    “You know, I’ve been thinking
    I ought to stop drinking
    But to waste this last fifth is a shame”

  31. BoysanHawaii says:

    A fellow was way off his game,
    He thought he was smooth with his dame,
    “If you pet my poodle,
    Here’s my ‘kit and kaboodle’,”
    She slapped him and then he felt lame

  32. A fellow was way off his game…
    Wrecked his life balling an old flame…
    Seems hot bloomers were often his weakness…
    But his wife was not known for her meekness…
    Fittingly, Lorena Bobbit was her name.

  33. Manicddaily says:

    Young Novak was way off his game
    and decided that wheat was to blame.
    He gave up all bread,
    eating rice cakes instead,
    and soon put old Roger to shame.

    (This could work also as follows:)

    A fellow was way off his game
    and decided that wheat was to blame.
    He gave up all bread
    earing rice cakes instead,
    and soon put R. Federer to shame.

  34. a fellow was way off his game
    the other team giving him shame
    one brick now ten
    he missed it again
    this old horse has now come up lame

  35. tashtoo says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    In fact he was rather insane
    Though appeared normal did he
    Wasn’t hard to see
    That not all was right with his brain.

  36. laurie kolp says:

    A fellow was way off his game,
    he forgot from which way he came.
    The crowd tried to warn him,
    screamed, “You’re on the wrong end!”
    Too late, he scored two points; insane.

  37. Tom Brady was way off his game
    But his wife found his teammates to blame.
    “He can’t catch his own passes;
    It’s those clumsy asses
    That fumbled the ball,” was her claim.

    True story. Gisele Bündchen actually said this after Sunday’s Super Bowl. (I may be paraphrasing just a little.)

  38. Granny Smith says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    Embarrassed and kneeling in shame
    For he knew he had gaffed
    When his tiny girl laughed
    And his Tiddlywink still wouldn’t aim.

  39. Mark Kane says:

    A fellow was way off his game,
    As he valiantly chased an old flame,
    But after much wine,
    He seemed to do fine,
    They cuddled and played, then she came!

  40. Mark Kane says:

    A woman was way off her game,
    As she sang for her fortune and fame.
    But Simon found her so trite,
    Just a pitiful sight.
    And her singing, well that was just lame.

  41. Mark Kane says:

    A fellow was way off his game,
    While trying to diddle his dame.
    But she cried “That’s just painful”,
    And not at all gainful.
    Then she left in a huff, what a shame.

  42. Johanna Richmond says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    In an effort to spark his old flame
    (Cause that dumb webcam trick
    To elongate his wick
    Worked no better the second time – lame!)

  43. Mark Megson says:

    A fellow was way off his game
    And the bishop and rook were to blame
    They kicked him off the board
    With his horse and his sword
    Because he failed to take the queen when she came

    Or similarly because I love Monopoly as well –

    A fellow was way off his game
    And the dog and the boot were to blame
    The horseman acted stroppily
    To being kicked from Monopoly
    For robbing the bank with the train

  44. Glenn Cassidy says:

    A revision.

    A fellow was way off his game.
    (You can tell if you Google his name.)
    Then came a swarum
    of wins for Santorum.
    Now his competition looks a bit lame.

  45. Dr. Goose says:

    A fellow was way off his game, 
    As he tried to ignite a new flame,
    And he ruined the mood
    When he clumsily cooed:
    “Ich lieb dich” instead of “je t’aime.”

  46. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for your fun limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners: Limerick of the Week 48.

    But don’t worry if you’ve missed the fun. A new Limerick-Off has already begun: Campaigning For Limericks.