Limerick of the Week (47)
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to JIM DELANEY who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:
The chairman was trying to lead
An attack upon corporate greed,
But his own compensation
Would fund a small nation —
Not quite the credentials you need.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Neal Pattison, Bruce Niedt, Edmund Conti, David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose, and Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Neal Pattison:
A fellow was trying to lead
A life filled with daring and deed.
To his friends, who all hooted,
He said, “I’m well suited,”
As he buttoned his Seville Row tweed.
Bruce Niedt:
A salesman was trying to lead
His date to a sexual deed.
But when he unzipped
She took one look and quipped,
“Satisfaction is NOT guaranteed!”
Edmund Conti:
A fellow was trying to lead
His wife to the mens’ room (Great need!)
Said his wife, “Not a chance!
We’re going to dance.”
So they danced on and on while he peed.
David Lefkovits:
A fellow who wanted to lead
The nation in turning from greed,
Found most in agreement,
When thinking that he meant
The other guy’s greedy misdeed.
Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith:
A fellow was trying to lead
His small pup (newly bought, pedigreed).
The son of a bitch
Would rather just ITCH
Than be led to the vet and deFLEAed.
Phyllis adds this Limerick Note:
In my rhyming I have this strange vanity
That my jokes not depend on profanity.
That small dog with the itch
Was the offspring of bitch.
To rely on swear-words is insanity!
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Bruce Niedt, David Lefkovits, Edmund Conti, Jim Delaney, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, Neal Pattison, Phyllis Sterling Smith, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
They’re all great, but I LOVE Phyllis’–both the original AND the additional note lim!
Thanks for this second honour of first place, Mad, and thanks to all who “liked” my limerick on your Facebook page. I don’t know whether that affects the result in any way, but it’s appreciated nonetheless.
Great winners…thanks for the laughs!
Congrat Jim-great rhyme. Unlike Bruce’s character, when it comes to great limericks satisfaction IS guaranteed here at Mad’s!
Congratulations once again to all the winners!
And regarding Jim Delaney’s implied question about the impact of Facebook likes on the results, here’s the deal: I don’t base my Limerick-Off selections on Facebook “likes.” However, once I’ve made my preliminary decision, I scan through the likes to see if perhaps I’ve overlooked a great limerick. I do remember one occasion where a limerick that I didn’t quite “get” had gotten a ton of “likes.” So I gave it another look and realized I’d missed a clever, pop cultural reference. So that limerick ended up getting an Honorable Mention.
Thank you, Mad, for including me in this set of clever limerick writers. Every one was one that I had “liked” on facebook.
Thanks for the honorable mention, and congrats to Jim Delaney, whose verse I particularly enjoyed.
Very nice limericks — I agree completely with the sentiments, Jim, Congrats to all!
Thanks everyone for your kind comments!