Archive for January, 2012
Sunday, January 29th, 2012
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow was trying to lead…*
or
A woman was trying to lead…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
Leading With Limericks
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow was trying to lead,
But his rumba was not up to speed.
His steps got all tangled,
His partner’s feet mangled.
I’m guessing that’s why he was kneed.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
UPDATE: Happy International Dance Day! (April 29th)
Tags: April Holidays, Ballroom Dance, Dancing Humor, International Dance Day, Limerick Contest, Odd Holidays, Poetry & Prompts, Rumba, Writing Prompts
Posted in Contests, Dance Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 62 Comments »
Sunday, January 29th, 2012
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to JANE SHELTON HOFFMAN who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:
A man with a very full plate
Ordinarily had to work late,
But his young, lovely wife
Had her own secret life.
Let’s just say her masseur was quite straight.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Colleen Murphy, J Cosmo Newbery, Byron Miller a/k/a Errol Nimbly, Versebender, and Johanna Richmond. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Colleen Murphy:
A gal with a very full plate
Went out on her very first date,
But with ten minutes gone
It was time to move on,
So she jilted her dumbfounded mate.
J Cosmo Newbery:
A man with a very full plate
Ignored the allure of his date.
“The main course is divine,
Then there’s cake, cheese and wine;
The entree will just have to wait.”
Bryon Miller a/k/a Errol Nimbly:
A nymphet with a personal plate
Would slow down and cause traffic to wait.
As men drove up behind her
They read this reminder:
IALWZGVHEDWNID8
Versebender:
A man with a very full plate
Had no time to look for a mate.
So he ordered online
A companion divine
That all he need do is inflate.
Johanna Richmond:
Bachman’s man has a very full plate,
What with legions of gays to set straight.
But his “pray away” swagger,
Suggests the old wagger
May have tried out the rear pearly gate.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Byron Miller, Colleen Murphy, J Cosmo Newbery, Jane Shelton Hoffman, Johanna Richmond, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, VerseBender, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limerick Writing Contest | 2 Comments »
Saturday, January 28th, 2012
If you enjoy funny song lyrics, you need to give Mark Westin’s latest album a listen. Dark Humour is packed with songs whose cleverness is the envy of humorists like me.
I, for one, can’t resist titles like Narcissistic As Me, Open Mike, When Beautiful People Break Up, and this soon to be classic Falling In Love On Facebook.
In fact, Falling In Love On Facebook was the song that made me fall in love with Mark Westin’s lyrics: A couple of years ago I heard Westin perform it live at one of his regular performance venues: Whistling Willie’s, an excellent restaurant in Cold Spring, New York.
So check it out — you’ll love the lyrics. Besides, Mark Westin plays a mean guitar.
Tags: Album Review, CD Reviews, Dark Humour, Guitar, Mark Westin, Music, Music Review, Recording Review, Restaurants, Song Lyrics, Whistling Willie's
Posted in Music Humor & Verse, Music Reviews, Public Figures | Comments Off on CD Review: Mark Westin’s Dark Humour
Saturday, January 28th, 2012
I was browsing my GooglePlus feed, when I encountered this post by poet Tyler Lovelace:
I hate when the first verse of a poem writes itself just to tease you. Then you have to force a lot of the poem out.
I swear my muses are all teases and skanks.
Tyler’s post prompted me to write this comment:
Trimmed down, that could make you a good limerick first line:
“My muses are teases and skanks …”
Tyler immediately (and generously) said the line was mine, thereby becoming my non-tease, non-skanky muse.
Here’s my limerick:
Muse Amusement
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My muses are teases and skanks—
At their worst when my mind’s drawing blanks.
When they offer me rot,
Then I warn them, “Do not
Expect thanks for a concept that tanks!”
Tags: Creativity, GooglePlus, Muse, Social Media Poetry, Tyler Lovelace, Writer's Block, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Google, Limericks, Social Media Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | 2 Comments »
Friday, January 27th, 2012
Google compiles basic profiles on each of its users, based on web browsing habits. And I just found out I’m a 65-plus male.
If you’re wondering who Google thinks you are, simply sign into Google and visit your ad preferences.
Google Doesn’t Have My Number (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It seems Google believes I’m a guy–
One who’s 65-plus. And here’s why:
It claims its conclusion
Is ad-based — Delusion!
Ask my husband — this profile’s a lie!
Tags: Ads Limerick, Advertising Humor, Google, Marketing Humor, Money Poems, Search Engines, Shopping Verse, User Profiles
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Limericks, Marketing Humor, Marriage Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Shopping Humor | 4 Comments »
Wednesday, January 25th, 2012
I strongly support stem cell research. But that doesn’t mean I won’t mock it. After all, science article titles like this are impossible to resist: Stem Cells Build a Better Rat Penis.
Waxing Silly About Science (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Is your rat penis painfully small?
There’s help for you — here’s who to call:
A Doc at Tulane —
His team will explain
How stem cells can make that thing tall.
Tags: Animal Verse, Bawdy Humor, Medical Studies Humor, Medicine, Men's Health, Penis Humor, Rats Humor, Research Limerick, Science Verse, ScienceNow, Stem Cell Research, Tulane
Posted in Animal & Pet Humor, Bawdy Limericks, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limericks, Science Humor | 7 Comments »
Sunday, January 22nd, 2012
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A gal with a very full plate…*
or
A man with a very full plate…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
A Plateful Of Limericks
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal with a very full plate
Was planning to cancel a date.
But the fellow’s insistence
Met little resistance:
The allure of good food was too great.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Dating Humor, Employment Humor, Food Verse, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Workplace Poetry, Writing Prompts
Posted in Contests, Dating Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 54 Comments »
Sunday, January 22nd, 2012
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to JOHANNA RICHMOND who wins Limerick of the Week for this clever two-verse limerick:
A fellow was trying to hide
His nature (mean, callous and snide),
But it’s hard to shrug off
With a wink and a scoff
What he did to his number two bride.
So the newt did what Newt does so well:
Told his critics to all go to hell.
With a blood-thirsty base,
Best grow fangs to save face.
Can you hear Willard Romney’s death knell?
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Jason Talbott, Gordon Richmond, Scott Crowder, Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes, and Elaine Spall. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Jason Talbott:
A fellow was trying to hide
Some cash that he earned on the side
As a writer of fiction.
His craft caused conviction–
When he filled out his taxes, he lied.
Gordon Richmond:
A fellow was trying to hide
His “size” from the young, pretty bride,
But soon she’d discover,
Once under the cover,
She’s in for a very short ride.
Scott Crowder:
A woman was trying to hide
The fact that her hair had been dyed.
But the truth would come out
And leave not a doubt
When the gal wore a swim thong poolside.
Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes:
A fellow was trying to hide
From his overly amorous bride.
He said “Wait a bit!
It’s time to admit
I got sea-sick the last time I tried!”
Elaine Spall:
A fellow was trying to hide
From six women, each claimed was his bride
When his half dozen wives
Set upon him with knives.
“Rest In Pieces” was scribed when he died.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Brenda Bryant, Elaine Spall, Gordon Richmond, Jason Talbott, Johanna Richmond, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, Scott Crowder, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limerick Writing Contest, Limericks | 8 Comments »
Tuesday, January 17th, 2012
If Facebook’s trying to annoy its users, it’s doing a really good job of it.
Lots of people (including me) have been wondering why their Facebook posts have been getting fewer comments and “likes.” Turns out that most people aren’t seeing the latest posts. Why? Because the “powers that be” at Facebook are morons!
To be more specific, Facebook’s News Feed default setting is now delivering old posts, referred to in polite company as “Highlighted Posts.” Want to see fresh posts, like a normal, sane person? Then you have to click on “Sort” and then select “Recent Stories First.”
To make matters worse, selecting “Recent Stories First” must be done routinely. Why? Because Facebook doesn’t allow you to permanently change its “Ancient Stories That You’re Really Sick Of & Never Want To See Again” default.
My Facebook rant wouldn’t be complete without a limerick, would it?
Yet Another Facebook Rant
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Facebook, I wish you would halt
Your News Feed’s annoying default:
It’s simply not sporting
To make us do sorting
To see posts that are fresh. Oy gevalt!
Tags: Facebook Humor, Facebook Limerick, Social Media Poetry
Posted in Facebook Humor, Limericks, Media Humor, Social Media Humor | 10 Comments »
Sunday, January 15th, 2012
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow was trying to hide…*
or
A woman was trying to hide…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
Hidden Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow was trying to hide
The fact that he’d patently lied
In claiming to be
A chem Ph.D.,
When he never had even applied.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Dishonesty, Education & School Humor, Limerick Contest, Patent Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Science Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Education & School Humor, Honesty Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Science Humor | 52 Comments »
Sunday, January 15th, 2012
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to JIM DELANEY who wins Limerick of the Week for this very clever verse:
A gal was upset by a bill
For an item she’d sent to Goodwill:
“For resale, we’ve got
To remove every spot,
And your coat had a lot, Ms. de Vil.”
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Colleen Murphy, Robert Basler, and Byron Miller a/k/a Errol Nimbly. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Colleen Murphy:
A gal was upset by a bill
She received from her ex-husband Will
For services rendered
Which he never tendered
With any compensable skill.
Robert Basler:
A man was upset by a bill
When he sought a professional kill.
He said, “Holy s**t!”
“You charge WHAT for a hit?”
So a pundit is punditing still.
Byron Miller a/k/a Errol Nimbly:
A man quite upset with a Bill,
Said the plays Bill had written were swill!
Whence there came no denial
From the bard, just a smile
And a poke in the eye from his quill.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Byron Miller, Colleen Murphy, Jim Delaney, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, Robert Basler, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limerick Writing Contest, Limericks | 7 Comments »
Thursday, January 12th, 2012
My Facebook friend, comedy writer/director/producer Chris Bearde, recently said:
Satire, taken broadly as a form of comedy protest, will bring you FB friends and lose you some too… so the playing field is always level.
Chris’s comments inspired me to write this limerick:
Political Un-Friendship (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Facebook friends can at times take offense
At jokes at their party’s expense.
If they click on “unfriend”
In order to end
Such humor exposure, they’re dense.
UPDATE: I’ve just found out that November 17th is National Unfriend Day. Apparently, the holiday was invented three years ago by Jimmy Kimmel. So, who should be “unfriended?” According to Kimmel, the “proud parent,” “the Instagrammer,” and the “overly-political poster” should all be history. Methinks I fall afoul of the third category.
Tags: Chris Bearde, Comedy Protest, Facebook Friendship, Facebook Humor, National Unfriend Day, November Holidays, Political Sensitivity, Satire, Sense Of Humor, Social Media Poetry
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Communication Humor, Facebook Humor, Friendship Humor, Limericks, Political Satire, Public Figures, Relationship Humor, Social Media Humor, Social Satire | 9 Comments »
Sunday, January 8th, 2012
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A man was upset by a bill…*
or
A gal was upset by a bill…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
Limerick Bill
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man was upset by a bill
That was pending on Capitol Hill.
He assumed it impacted
His work if enacted.
Seems dentists hate “drill baby drill.”
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Bills Humor, Dentists, Drill Baby Drill, Legislation Limerick, Limerick Contest, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 48 Comments »
Sunday, January 8th, 2012
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to GORDON RICHMOND who wins Limerick of the Week for this clever verse:
As the new year approaches, men swear
They will aim for the toilet with care,
But the subject in hand
May ignore the command
And reroute its direction mid-air.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Robert Basler, Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes, Robert Schechter, Madeleine Sara Maddocks, Johanna Richmond, and Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Robert Basler:
As the new year approaches, men swear
They will read all the works of Flaubert.
But soon, it’s “Hey, Mabel!
“This channel on cable
“Shows reruns of ‘Sonny and Cher!’”
Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes:
As the New Year approaches men swear
That they’ll have a real hot love-affair.
But the girls that they meet
In the bar, on the street,
Say “We’re sorry! Your cupboard is bare!”
Robert Schechter:
As the new year approaches, men swear
To rise from their sofa or chair
And move their fat asses.
The impulse soon passes,
Replaced by a staunch laissez faire.
Madeleine Sara Maddocks:
As the new year approaches, men swear
To dispose of their old underwear,
As their grubby old briefs
Rouse disparaging shrieks
From the gals they invite to their lair.
Johanna Richmond:
As the new year approaches, men swear:
No more meat or at least none cooked rare;
Why have twelve beers when six
Is an adequate fix?
As for porn, only followed by prayer!
Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith:
As the New Year approaches, gals swear
That they MUST buy some NEW clothes to wear.
But each husband still clings
To his old worn-out things:
“You can NOT throw them out. Don’t you dare!”
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Brenda Bryant, Gordon Richmond, Johanna Richmond, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, Madeleine Sara Maddocks, Phyllis Sterling Smith, Robert Basler, Robert Schechter, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, Limerick Writing Contest, Limericks | 6 Comments »
Thursday, January 5th, 2012
This woman is clearly a creative criminal:
DENVER — A 36-year-old woman was charged Wednesday after punching, scratching and sliding her buttocks against a painting worth more than $30 million, authorities in Colorado said.
Carmen Tisch is accused of pulling her pants down to rub up against the work, an oil-on-canvas called “1957-J no.2”, by the late abstract expressionist artist Clyfford Still.
The Critical Ass
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Some critics can be rather tough
On art they don’t like, even rough.
But to rub your nude ass
On it seems rather crass.
Her defense? She was trying to buff.
Tags: Abstract Art Satire, Art Limerick, Carmen Tisch, Clyfford Still, Colorado, Crime, Critics Humor, Law Humor, Vandals
Posted in Art Humor / Verse, Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Crime & Punishment Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks | 1 Comment »
Sunday, January 1st, 2012
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too. The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
As the new year approaches, men swear…*
or
As the new year approaches, gals swear…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
Limerick For The New Year
By Madeleine Begun Kane
As the new year approaches, men swear
That they’ll finally end their affair.
They’ll diet, work out,
Learn to ski, buy some grout.
What’s their chance of success? Not a pray’r!
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Affair Limerick, Health Limericks, Holiday Humor, Limerick Contest, New Year's Humor, New Year's Resolutions Verse, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Competitions, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Holiday Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 79 Comments »
Sunday, January 1st, 2012
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to BYRON MILLER a/k/a ERROL NIMBLY who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:
A husband who’d stepped on some toes,
Always staying out late with some hos,
Woke to breakfast in bed
And a short note, which read:
Here’s your sausage, I hope it regrows.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose, Jane Shelton Hoffman, Matty, RJ Clarken, Gordon Richmond, and Byron Miller a/k/a Errol Nimbly. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose:
A fellow who’d stepped on some toes
When competing with ballroom dance pros
Displayed in his jive,
While broadcasting live,
What a slip of the zip might expose.
Jane Shelton Hoffman:
A fellow who’d stepped on some toes
Had created a large group of foes.
So in spite of his drive
His career took a dive
And he ended up stocking at Lowes.
Matty:
A fellow who’d stepped on some toes
Had an ego as big as his nose,
Until one day his bride
Shot a hole in his pride
And told him the sex really blows.
RJ Clarken:
A fellow who stepped on some toes
And garnered political woes
Told more lies and then cheered
When opponents got smeared
While the public got led by the nose.
Gordon Richmond:
A woman who’d stepped on some toes
By writing her triple X prose
Was sent off to jail
And denied any bail;
Now she lives with the rest of the hos.
Byron Miller a/k/a Errol Nimbly:
Said a sultan who’d stepped on some toes,
“In a harem, that’s just how it goes:
With my wives all entangled
A few may get mangled —
It’s best to arrange them in rows.”
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Byron Miller, David Lefkovits, Gordon Richmond, Jane Shelton Hoffman, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, Matty, RJ Clarken, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, Limerick Writing Contest, Limericks | 3 Comments »
