I just found out that this week (May 1 through May 7) is National Pet Week. So I thought I’d celebrate with a canine limerick:
A Limerick About Nothing
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow who owned a pet dog
Took him out for a walk in the fog.
Soon the man and his hound
Were back home safe and sound,
Where he wrote up their walk on his blog.
UPDATE: Happy “Walking The Dog Day.” (February 22)
Last month I had such a good time writing these two acrostic limericks, that I had to try another in response to a new prompt from Acrostics Only.
Acrostic Limerick: Hot, Cross Lovers
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A flexible gal who is spry,
Gymnastically gifted, and sly
Initiates sex,
Leaves her lovers as wrecks —
Enticing, entrapping — oh my!
UPDATE: April 23 is Lover’s Day
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus four Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here are two excellent resources: OEDILF on Writing A Limerick and Speedy Snail’s Limerick Rhythm and Meter.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A gal had to cancel her plan…
or
A man had to cancel his plan…
Here’s mine. (It’s a two-verse limerick, but a standard one-verser will be fine, of course.)
Spurned Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal had to cancel her plan
To marry a very cute man.
He spurned her advances,
Ignored all her glances —
‘Twas over before it began.
She was angry and wanted him dead —
Dreamt of murder while lying in bed.
Now at last he’s been killed
And those thoughts have been stilled,
For that fellow was all in her head.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and four Honorable Mentions (three single verse limericks and one multiverse limerick.)
Congratulations to DAVID LEFKOVITS a/k/a Dr. Goose who wins Limerick of the Week for this excellent limerick:
A woman who loved a good fight
Would demand, as she argued all night,
Philosophical heft
From those on the left
And empirical proof from the right.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith, VerseBender, Paul Andrew Russell, and Patrice Stewart a/k/a Patrice of the ManyCats. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith:
A woman who loved a good fight
Invited to dinner one night
A catholic, a Jew,
Palestinians too.
They kissed and made up out of spite!
VerseBender:
A woman who loved a good fight
Said, “Darlin’, you know it’s all right
The reason I’m itchin’
To get in some bitchin’:
The making up part’s a delight!”
Paul Andrew Russell:
A fellow who loved a good fight
Would go on a rumble all night.
He’d punch and he’d jeer,
Fueled on gallons of beer.
Then strut off to bed at first light.
Patrice Stewart a/k/a Patrice of the ManyCats:
A fellow who loved a good fight
Took on inner demons each night.
They’d roll, tumble, wrestle,
His body the vessel ~
A bone-chilling, hair-raising sight.He’d chortle and shout out with glee,
“You’ll not get the better of me!
Mephistopheles, please:
You’re just a big tease!
I’ll win soon, and then I’ll be free…”He leapt, intercepted the horde,
Sharp blade sweeping down as they roared…
Came the dawn, not a peep
As he smiled, deep in sleep ~
Grasp firm on invisible sword.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions. There were so many good ones, narrowing them down to the best five was quite a challenge.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
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