Taking Stock Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here are two excellent resources: OEDILF on Writing A Limerick and Speedy Snail’s Limerick Rhythm and Meter.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A man thought it time to take stock…

or

A gal thought it time to take stock…

Here’s mine:

Taking Stock Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man thought it time to take stock
Of his life in the world of hard rock
Cuz he made little dough
And to add to his woe,
He preferred playing Handel and Bach.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!

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53 Responses to “Taking Stock Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. Rinkly Rimes says:

    Frock Shock.

    I realy look forward to doing these. Even before I make the bed!

  2. kanchan bhattacharya says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    Of break in and entry without a knock,
    His efforts were staid,
    His crimes never paid
    Because of his incompetence at any door lock!

  3. Versebender says:

    Mad, you’ve set the bar too high…rhyming with “Bach” is pure genius!

    A man thought it time to take stock
    When asked by his wife ‘bout her frock
    “Dear, do you think that
    It makes me look fat?”
    Wrong answer and he’ll need a doc

  4. Jingle says:

    perfect wording..

    bless you, Happy Mother’s Day.

    A++

  5. Versebender says:

    Scans better this way…

    A man thought it time to take stock
    When asked by his wife ‘bout her frock
    “Do you, dear, think that
    It makes me look fat?”
    Wrong answer and he’ll need a doc

  6. Dr. Goose says:

    Loved your rhyme, Mad!

    A man thought it time to take stock,
    After giving the world a great shock;
    “We’ve gotten,” said he,
    “Our arch-enemy,
    After pulling the troops from Iraq.”

  7. Adore the sizzling meanings of “hard rock”! A great, jaunty limerick!

  8. Cindy Vroman says:

    A gal thought it time to take stock,
    When she married her boyfriend Barack,
    A nice quiet life,
    I will live as your wife,
    But alas, I hit the jackpot!

  9. Biff’s Limerick

    A man thought it time to take stock
    of the times that he’d said “knock knock”.
    Tap tap to the head
    while the words are said
    brought karma that still caused him shock.

  10. Poetic License?

    A man thought it time to take stock
    A break from just punching the clock
    He tried something radical:
    Poetic sabbatical
    Too bad all he’d written was schlock

  11. Madeleine, this week was fun! I, too, prefer Handel and Bach, but have plenty of rock gigs in my sordid past (wedding singer, ugh). Amy

    Here’s one more for you:
    Last Stop on the Erie Lackawanna

  12. Marie York says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    towards the end of his life as a jock…
    of the part he can’t fix
    when he partied for kicks
    which when judgment day comes, they would knock.

  13. earlybird says:

    A gal thought it time to take stock
    when once, on omitting to knock,
    she turned on the lights,
    found her man dressed in tights
    and struggling to do up a frock.

  14. The king thought it time to take stock
    of the style of the age belle époque.
    He summoned his guru
    and with great ballyhoo
    he decreed “From now on, we’re baroque.”

  15. The king thought it time to take stock
    of the style of the age belle époque.
    He consulted his guru
    and with much ballyhoo
    he decreed “From now on, we’re baroque.”

    Slight modification!

  16. madkane says:

    Thanks everyone for your fun limericks and kind words. Please keep those limericks coming and, if you’re on Facebook, cross-post them on my FB post. Thanks again!

  17. A man thought it was time to take stock
    His life carved from rock
    Every moment etched clean
    Life had all but lost its sheen
    So he decided it was time to toss out the clock

    I am terrible at rhymes! You guys are so clever

  18. Poetjanstie says:

    A man thought it time to take stock;
    to prepare himself after the shock,
    ‘cos his wife ran away
    with a man who was gay,
    but, it’s all right, she’s a schlock.

  19. Poetjanstie says:

    Earlbird’s ‘man in frock’ Limerick is really excellent!

  20. madkane says:

    Poetjanstie, I agree re ‘man in frock.’

    Candice, welcome to my Limerick-offs! Actually your rhyming’s just fine, but you have a few extra syllables scattered through your limerick. May I suggest that you tighten it like this, for instance:

    A man thought it time to take stock.
    His life had been carved from a rock,
    Every moment etched clean —
    Life had lost all its sheen.
    He decided to toss out the clock.

  21. Rinkly Rimes says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    So he thought he’d go out in a frock.
    He tripped over his skirt
    And fell down in the dirt
    And knocked himself out on a rock.
    *

    I thought I’d better follow suit with the entire limerick.

  22. madkane says:

    Rinkly, I’m glad you did post your entire limerick here, as well as on your blog. While I certainly do read the linked limericks, my guess is a lot of visitors just read the ones that are posted here. :)

  23. deathsweep says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    of the date as he set his clock
    his taxes filed late
    he knew not his fate
    He’d better call H&R Block

  24. Madeleine,
    It is always fun to visit your blog and words!
    Enjoyed reading this very much,
    Eileen

  25. Martin H says:

    A man though it time to take stock,
    As his body, it started to knock.
    He coloured his hair,
    Wore tight jeans for a dare,
    But had too many miles on the clock.

    Poetry24 – News is the Muse

  26. hansi says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    After his portfolio dropped like a rock
    Following bad advice
    He doubled down twice
    Leaving his retirement plans in for a shock

  27. dustus says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    Soar like an eagle over poor flocks
    He called an investor
    Doubled his tender
    Proposed with a five carat rock

  28. Mia says:

    hehe who wouldn’t prefer that? ;)

  29. scott says:

    A man thought it time to take stock,
    of the days that he played ‘round the clock.
    When he and a girl’d
    go ’round the world.
    But now he can’t go ‘round the block

  30. kez says:

    A gal thought it time to take stock
    But blimey what a shock
    A fashionista of modernity
    The clothes she now purchased were maternity
    Nine Months long she lived in flowery smocks

  31. kez says:

    came for a visit from another site where you had a link couldn’t resist having a go thank you

  32. Granny Smith says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    Of what’s wrong with his digital clock
    And, quite unprotected,
    He’s left it connected.
    Oh boy! Is he in for a shock!

  33. Granny Smith says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    Of the rivals he wanted to block
    Then his Trump-et he’d raise
    In hymns of self-praise
    Giving us one more target to mock.

  34. Poetjanstie says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    of his asset, a very large flock,
    on which all depends
    not the number of hens
    but the size of his huge brown cock.

  35. a man thought it time to take stock
    when he looked at the time on the clock
    for he’d wasted his days
    in a million ways
    as a man called Frederick from Bedrock

  36. Cindy Vroman says:

    A man thought it time to take stock,
    Cause his mother had named him Barack,
    It may cause me some trouble,
    In the political bubble,
    I could change it to Tom, maybe not!

  37. Veralynne Pepper says:

    A man thought it time to take stock,
    Having gone too many times ’round the block
    Said he: “But I love her.”
    Said she: “He’s my cover.
    His fortune’s all mine, f**k the cock!”

    Sorry. I had no other way out!

  38. Veralynne Pepper says:

    Oh, Hugh kid!

    A man thought it time to take stock,
    Having gone too many times ’round the block
    Said he: “But I love her.”
    Said she: “He’s my cover.
    His fortune’s all mine, f**k the cock!”

    Sorry. I had no other way out!
    I feel like I’m such a big lout!
    If I’d’a taken the time
    I’d’a come up with a rhyme
    That wouldn’ta packed such a clout.

    I know limericks can be risque
    Or bawdy and that’s still okay
    But downright profane
    Is really just a pain
    And shows one has nothing to say.

  39. madkane says:

    Thanks for your limericks, everyone, and please keep them coming!

  40. A gal thought it time to take stock,
    And so donned a pretty new frock.
    A man she’d beguile,
    With her fine sense of style,
    And in this way her future she’d lock!

  41. Madeleine, I had to come back and see what others have written. This is a joyful project you have started on your blog, and I hope you keep it up. Funny how a love of something becomes contagious!

    Amy
    Spring To Life Again.

  42. Geraldine says:

    Hi Madelaine, I noted your comment on OSI about loss, I am so sorry. Mother’s Day is always a hard one for me too. I just stopped in to leave a hug here.

    Take care, G

  43. Granny Smith says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    Of the worries he’d tried hard to block
    Then he fled to his boat
    And set it afloat
    Leaving troubles behind at the dock.

  44. Kay Salady says:

    Bangkok Baby

    A gal thought it time to take stock
    As she pondered her biological clock
    She invested in sperm
    From a trustworthy firm
    That was based in the land of Bangkok

    She turned forty years old in May
    Was injected and to her dismay
    When her child was born
    She sat there forlorn
    Wondering why did her son look this way

    When she had gone to Doctor Hank
    Upon her first time at the bank
    He assured her indeed
    He’d be tall as a reed
    With blue eyes like her Great Uncle Frank

  45. Victoria says:

    Well, I’m a bit late but here you go:

    A gal thought it time to take stock–
    Her love life was truly a crock
    She trusted her honey
    Who fled with her money
    Betrayal that left her in shock

    She hired a lawyer to sue
    And see that the creep got his due
    When she saw him in court
    He admitted his tort
    She said “Tough, it’s all over. We’re through.”

  46. Victoria says:

    Whoops. Could you change gla to gal, Mad? Thanks.

    (Note from Mad: Done. )

  47. Guy Peter Pietrobono says:

    A gal thought it time to take stock
    of her odd biological clock….
    “With 12 kids today,
    plus 3 on the way,
    these birth-control pills are a crock!”

  48. andy sewina says:

    Thanks Mad! I thought you were barking up the wrong tree for a mo, but what do I know? Tomato/tomato!

    Here’s mine:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    And Hickery Dickery Dock
    He started to chime
    with parsley and thyme
    when Mickey ran right up the clock

  49. Granny Smith says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    Of the number of sheep in his flock
    But counting of sheep
    Always put him to sleep
    So he set the alarm on his clock.

  50. Johanna Richmond says:

    A man thought it time to take stock
    Of his life as a forty-some jock
    So, pumping his pedals,
    He mounted his medals
    And showcased his prize shuttlecock.

  51. Johanna Richmond says:

    Weary Limerick

    An old gal thought it time to take stock
    Of advice she considered a crock;
    At the top of the list:
    Platitudes that insist
    One improves with each trip round the block.

  52. madkane says:

    I’m enjoying your limericks. Please keep them coming. You have tonight and Saturday before I pick the Limerick of the Week on Sunday. Thanks!

  53. madkane says:

    Thanks again everybody for your delightful limericks! This contest is officially over, and I’ve posted the Limerick of the Week winner and two Honorable Mentions here: Limerick of the Week 9.

    A new Limerick-Off contest has already begun. You can find it here: Limerick Plot.