Unappetizing Limerick
Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
So I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A man was enjoying dessert…
Here’s mine:
Unappetizing Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man was enjoying dessert
When he spotted a large spec of dirt.
He just flicked it away
And kept eating. Oy vey!
It touched down on his date’s new silk shirt.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
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Tags: Dating Poem, Dessert Humor, Etiquette Poetry, Food Verse, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
A man was enjoying dessert
With another helping he did flirt
Fast forward one hour later
He was still gorging to the chagrin of the waiter
Refusing to even notice how bad his stomach hurt!
A man was enjoying dessert
And Alas! was not much alert
He nibbled and guzzled
And was more and more puzzled
As his date’s conversation grew curt.
A man was enjoying dessert
When a waitress, incredibly pert,
Ridiculed his lip-smacking,
Yelled, “Your manners are lacking!
And, Good God, Man, look at your shirt!”
Fun limericks! Thanks everyone, and please keep them coming!
A man was enjoying his dessert
When some filling spewed onto his shirt
Since Wisconsin is where
He’d first savored E(au) Claire
He’d eat cheese next time- thus no squirt!
A man was enjoying dessert
when his stomach started to hurt.
Then instantly be noted
that though he was coated
he was eating his own tie and shirt.
A man was enjoying dessert,
When something moved ‘neath his shirt
He died with a shout,
as an alien popped out,
and finished his bowl of Sherbert.
A man was enjoying dessert,
in a manner you could say, covert.
The cause of his vanity-
along with humanity,
he sought calories rendered inert.
A man was enjoying dessert
When his stomach began to hurt.
He put down his glass,
Passed some noisy glass,
From others his eyes he did avert.
A man was enjoying dessert,
which made him less than alert
He lost his spoon in the cream,
which caused him to scream
“All this sugar makes me inert!”
A man was enjoying dessert
With a woman whose up-riding skirt,
While he flambéed the pudding,
Unsettled his footing,
Thus, sadly, igniting his shirt.
A man was enjoying dessert
The parfait was such a flirt
With layers of fudge
and cherries that smudge
Twas a bargain, as said the Advert
What a delightful selection of limericks! Thanks, everyone!
A man was enjoying dessert;
So it seemed. But a waiter, alert,
Realized he was a she
And just happened to be
A food critic (whose “kilt” was a skirt).
(This was prompted by the recent infamous outing of LA Times’ restaurant critic, Irene Virbila, whose party was thrown out of a new restaurant without being served after she was suddenly photographed by the angry restaurateur, who then posted her photo online.)
A man was enjoying dessert after Noel and New Year
and would have limned a limerick as the day was so fine and so clear,
But as things have it at this time of year,
His mind was tied into knots by excess of the season’s good cheer.
A man was enjoying dessert
in a cafe in Paris with Burt.
with cherries and cream,
this dish such a dream,
that it rendered his friend Burt inert.
More fun limericks! Thanks everyone! I’m enjoying these.
A man was enjoying dessert,
In a Mongolian yurt,
From yak exudate,
dissolving the plate,
enjoyment has now turned to hurt.
A man was enjoying dessert;
when fact made a move, caused alert;
had he known of the trick;
he’d have skipped spotted dick;
and gone straight for the good stuff like yogurt.
A man was enjoying dessert;
When republicans started to hurt;
a la schivo they legislated;
and outlawed items masticated;
enjoying food was out except dirt.
A man was enjoying dessert,
In some Cafe Mongolian Guest Yurt,
The dish was quite the mess
Till he took out the “s”
making desert dry cherry pie even less heard.