Pigheaded Limerick
Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow whose car had been towed…
Here’s mine. (It’s a three-verse limerick, but a standard one-verse limerick is fine, of course.)
Pigheaded Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow whose car had been towed
Freaked out when he heard what he owed.
“Highway robb’ry,” he yelled.
Then he sued — price upheld,
Plus penalties — made him explode.
So he threatened to file an appeal,
Though his wife said, “Enough! Make a deal!”
He responded, “No way!
I simply won’t pay.
Let them keep my damn automobile.”
But then he was hit with a lien.
And his wife said, “You see what I mean?
End this now or perforce
I will sue for divorce.”
That’s what comes of the stubbornness gene.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
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Tags: Battle of Sexes, Car & Driving Humor, Divorce Humor, Husband Wife Limerick, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Legal Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Stubbornness, Writing Prompts
A fellow whose car had been towed
didn’t know where the darned thing was stowed
He went to the cops
who looked in chop shops
and they found it in pieces – a load!
A fellow whose car had been towed
Paid a stiff fine, embarrassed and woed.
It cost 90 bucks,
Higher than impounded trucks,
He was broke when he paid what he owed.
.
A fellow whose car had been towed
Lost his temper on the darn road
He punched the cop on duty
The black eye, was a beauty
And in the jail was he stowed.
A fellow whose car had been towed
Had planned to haul an enormous load
But without a vehicle
And being really in a pickle
He gave up his trip on the road.
A fellow whose car had been towed
(Double-parked while he used the commode)
Remarked: “It’s a shame,
But nature’s to blame,
For I heeded ‘the call’ on the road.”
A fellow whose car had been towed
Sat alone on the side of the road
His mood was quite glum
For a bus would not come
Since the suburbs has been his abode!
What fun limericks! Please keep them coming and, if you’re on Facebook, cross-post there too. Thanks!
A fellow whose car had been towed
Paid all the fines that he owed.
He even kissed ass
Of policemen en masse
Just to get back on the road.
A fellow whose car had been towed
Tried to find out where it had goed….
He followed the path
And felt total wrath
Just like that old fellow, Tom Joad
A fellow whose car had been towed.
Decided to take the high road.
Though the shame has abated,
I have never related,
Now to all, my tale is bestowed.
March 9, ’82 was the day.
A street sign I didn’t obey.
I failed a breath test,
was put under arrest.
My green Pontiac towed away.
I bailed out the next day at dawn
My guilt, a conclusion forgone.
Covered in jailhouse stink,
and finger print ink
I went out and puked on the lawn.
To the impound lot I did trudge.
And there in the mud and the sludge,
of the very back row,
was my GTO,
ironically nicknamed “The Judge.”
Now it all seems so surreal.
That I could have been so puerile.
Though I do still drink,
I don’t even think,
of mixing liquor and automobiles.
A fellow whose car had been towed
Was scared at what that might forebode.
Given the drugs in the trunk,
This dope-running drunk
Hoofed it after one more for the road.
A fellow whose car had been towed
Saw a horse which he quickly lassoed.
Soon his level of grief
For the fines as horse thief
Beat the illegal parking fees owed.
A fellow whose car had been towed
Didn’t know what to do so he crowed
And screamed, cried and punched things
As if that could fix things
‘Til the cops towed HIM to his new abode
A fellow whose car had been towed
Was a surly drunk, what a load!
As he started walking
To himself he kept talking
“I’ll show THEM when I’m back on the road!”
A fellow whose car had been towed,
To adhere to his ethical code
And avoid talking smack
Ran the check through his crack,
Paid the fine and got back on the road.
I’m really enjoying these. Thanks, and please keep them coming!
A fellow whose car was being towed
Was asleep in the back-quite unclothed
For wild sex he’d embarked
While illegally parked
He was guilty of true penal code
A fellow whose car had been towed
His ass was such a wide load
He couldn’t walk home
So he sat down alone
There he stayed like a lazy fat toad
Sorry but it’s my first ever attempt at a limerick!!!