April 25th, 2025
When my boyfriend proposed, mom was pleased:
“No returns, no exchanges,” she teased.
She was thrilled with our match,
For she thought him a catch…
And her “old maid” concerns were appeased.
Tags: Dating Humor, Dating Limerick, Engagement Humor, Engagement Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Mothers Humor, Mothers Limerick
Posted in Dating Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Parenting Humor | No Comments »
April 10th, 2025
I’m attempting to write a short ditty
About something that’s dreadfully shitty.
But I’m getting the blues
From my options — can’t choose
The right shitstorm. (Things lately ain’t pretty!)
Tags: Writing & Publishing Humor, Writing Humor, Writing Limerick
Posted in Limericks, Writing & Publishing Humor | 1 Comment »
April 8th, 2025
An old fellow who’d putter all day
Would refuse to throw refuse away.
When his wife tried to deal
With his clutter, he’d squeal
As he rescued his rubbish array.
Tags: Argument Humor, Clutter Humor, Clutter Limerick, Garbage Humor, Garbage Limerick, Husbands Humor, Husbands Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Trash Humor, Trash Limerick
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limericks, Marriage Humor | No Comments »
April 7th, 2025
As the cop brought her in, the young lass
Acknowledged she’d done something crass:
“In hindsight,” she said,
When her rights had been read,
“I shouldn’t have bared my cute ass.”
Tags: Arrests, Bawdy Humor, Bawdy Limericks, Cop Humor, Cop Limerick, Naked Humor, Naked Limerick, Nudity Humor, Nudity Limerick
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Crime & Punishment Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Physical Appearance | 1 Comment »
April 6th, 2025
“You are constantly spouting some beef,”
Said his boss. “It’s non-stop. No relief!
Your complaints (mostly petty)
Don’t stick. They’re spaghetti.
Do your job and stop giving me grief!”
Tags: Bosses Humor, Bosses Limerick, Complaints, Employee Humor, Employee Limerick, Workplace Humor, Workplace Limerick
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Workplace & Career Humor | No Comments »
April 2nd, 2025
For some inexplicable reason, tomorrow (April 3) is World Party Day.
Large festivities aren’t my scene.
I’m a hermit, at heart, and not keen
On behavior vivacious,
Flirtatious, or gracious.
Yes, NOT being seen has its sheen.
Tags: April Holidays, Hermits, Odd Holidays, Party Day, Party Humor, Party Limerick, Personality Humor, Personality Limerick, Socializing Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Limericks, Odd Holidays | No Comments »
March 29th, 2025
An old boor who believes that he’s hot
Is considered decidedly NOT.
He’s called “too cool for school”
And an “arrogant fool
With less charm than your average bot.”
Tags: Behavior Humor, Behavior Limerick, Boors Humor, Boors Limerick, Personality Humor, Personality Limerick, Personality Verse
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Idiom Humor, Limericks | No Comments »
March 26th, 2025
For the record, I hate eating fish and I’ve never gone fishing. (But I had a fun time with the prompt word “catch.”)
We were s’posed to go fishing, but natch,
It’s too stormy again; we must scratch
All our catch-eating plans.
Guess I’ll open two cans
Of smoked trout. Why’s there always a catch?
Tags: Fish Humor, Fish Limerick, Fishing Humor, Fishing Limerick, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Seafood Humor
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Outdoors Humor | No Comments »
March 18th, 2025
My dear husband’s gone off to a pub.
I’ve stayed home cuz I hate all the grub
That they serve on this day.
Consume corned beef? No way!
Plus I’ve joined the new “Recluses Club.”
Tags: Beer, Cabbage, Celebrations Poetry, Food Poem, Holiday Humor, Irish Limerick, Irish Pubs, March Holidays, Seasonal Verse, St. Paddy's Day
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Holiday Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor | No Comments »
March 16th, 2025
My short height makes it hard to withstand
Heavy wind gusts. I’d rather not land
On the sidewalk face down.
Broken bones make me frown…
And I DON’T want more body parts scanned.
Tags: Accident Humor, Accident Limerick, Height Humor, Height Limerick, Walking Humor, Walking Limerick, Weather Humor, Weather Limerick, Wind Gusts, Wind Humor, Wind Limerick
Posted in Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Outdoors Humor, Physical Appearance, Weather Humor | No Comments »
March 15th, 2025
Can you help me get out of my jam?
I was eating some jelly and, damn,
It’s all over my dress
And I’m rather a mess,
So I need something STAT to look glam!
Tags: Appearance Humor, Appearance Limerick, Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Dress Humor, Dress Limerick, Emergency Humor, Emergency Limerick, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Glamor Humor, Glamor Limerick, Jam Humor, Jam Limerick
Posted in Clothing Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Physical Appearance | No Comments »
March 14th, 2025
Myopic teacher
mistook inept coloring
for misbehavior.
The prompt for this haiku was “myopic” (plus a memorable personal experience.) When I was 4, my teacher punished me for not coloring within the lines. (I had very bad vision, which hadn’t yet been diagnosed.) And my teacher actually called my parents in to complain about my bad behavior. (My vision wasn’t tested till I was 9 and got coke bottle glasses.)
Tags: Art Haiku, Childhood Haiku, Coloring Books, School Haiku, Teachers Haiku, Vision Haiku
Posted in Art Humor / Verse, Children Humor, Education & School Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Haiku & Senryu, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Parenting Humor, Personal, Poetry & Prompts | No Comments »
February 24th, 2025
When comedians freak out and fold
Cuz their jokes left an audience cold,
It is said that they’ve laid
An egg. I’m afraid
That their jokes (and those eggs) can’t be sold.
Tags: Comedian Humor, Comedian Limerick, Comedians, Comediennes, Comedy Limerick, Egg Humor, Egg Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Wordplay, Wordplay Humor, Wordplay Limerick
Posted in Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Wordplay | No Comments »
February 12th, 2025
How I love to write lim’ricks amusing!
But with news so depressing and bruising,
I’m confined to a tonic
Of verse that’s sardonic.
Blame my Muse! (She’s morose, so she’s snoozing.)
Tags: Inspiration Humor, Inspiration Limerick, Muse, Muse Limerick, News Humor, News Limerick
Posted in Limericks, News Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | No Comments »
January 22nd, 2025
“Have you noticed that men can’t abide
Being told that a lace is untied?
A mere warning that’s gentle
Turns many males ‘mental.’
I am fit to be tied,” cried the bride.
Tags: Attire Humor, Battle of Sexes, Battle of the Sexes, Clothing Humor, Laces Humor, Marriage Humor, Men and Women, Shoes Humor
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Clothing Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor | Comments Off on Loose Ends (Limerick)
January 11th, 2025
When the staff mentioned leaks and a draft,
Their mean manager grimaced and laughed.
Then he raved and he ranted,
But soon was supplanted;
Staffers craftily pinned him for graft.
Tags: Bad Bosses, Boss Humor, Boss Limerick, Crime Humor, Crime Limerick, Workplace Humor, Workplace Limerick
Posted in Crime & Punishment Humor, Limericks, Workplace & Career Humor | Comments Off on A Workplace Row (Limerick)
January 8th, 2025
While in school, I liked one type of test;
Those with “multiple choice.” They’re the best!
Choices helped me regain
Info deep in my brain,
So they made me look smart, when I guessed.
Tags: Brain Humor, Education Humor, Education Limerick, Exams Humor, Exams Limerick, Memory Humor, Memory Limerick, School Humor, School Limerick, Test Humor, Test Limerick
Posted in Education & School Humor, Limericks, Memory Humor | 1 Comment »
January 8th, 2025
The young dentist was rooting around
In my mouth, till he told me he’d found
The root cause of my pain:
“Please don’t frown, Mrs. Kane,
But it’s plain that you’re root-canal bound.”
Tags: Dentist Humor, Dentist Limerick, Pain Humor, Pain Limerick, Root Canal Humor, Teeth Humor, Teeth Limerick, Tooth Humor
Posted in Health & Medical Humor, Limericks | Comments Off on Rooting Around For A Limerick
January 6th, 2025
Tags: Funny Haiku, Haiku Humor, Rhyming Haiku, Rhyming Humor, Senryu Humor, Spelling Humor, Wordplay Haiku, Wordplay Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Haiku & Senryu, Language Humor, Wordplay | 2 Comments »
January 4th, 2025
Some assert, “There’s no rest for the weary,”
A bleak proverb that makes many teary.
And yet I can attest
That a multi-bar rest
Tends to make bleary oboists cheery.
Tags: Exhaustion, Idioms Humor, Idioms Limerick, Music Humor, Music Limerick, Musician Humor, Musician Limerick, Oboe, Oboe Humor, Oboe Limerick, Proverbs, Relaxation Humor, Relaxation Limerick
Posted in Idiom Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Workplace & Career Humor | Comments Off on No Rest For The Weary? (Limerick)
